Ryan Adams
"I've learned to have a sense of humour about things that I can't change."
Do you hear that, coming from Ryan Adams? From the man who scuffled verbally with critics, record labels and the yahoos among his audiences? From the cocky fella who rebelled, too willingly, like Brando's wild one?
The singer-songwriter, now 37, recently released Ashes & Fire, his ninth solo album since 2000, depending on who's doing the counting: His discography, on his own and with the bands Whiskeytown and the Cardinals, is as complicated as the man himself.
Speaking on the phone in advance of a solo acoustic show at Toronto's Winter Garden Theatre on Saturday, the mercurial Adams also says he's never been upset at people yelling things at him while he's onstage. This is a surprising revelation – I've seen him in action, with dullard provocateurs poking him with sticks; and he, in return, railing back in overly pointed response.
So I ask him: Ryan Adams, you were an angry young handful, were you not? He replies honestly, saying that in his 20s he was earnest, and that he fought a bit too hard to be taken seriously even though he knew it was the wrong thing to do. "I couldn't separate my pride from what I did. I cared so much, because I tried to live the life of a songwriter and create something that hadn't been created before. It was only natural I would have gotten knocked down a bit."
Ashes & Fire finds Adams in mellow and thoughtful form – a warm display of his easygoing ballads and affecting chord changes, with comforting instrumentation from producer and newly inducted member of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, Glyn Johns (the legendary man behind the glass for the Rolling Stones's Beggars Banquet, the Who's Who's Next, the Clash's Combat Rock and the eponymous debuts of the Eagles and Led Zeppelin).
One track, Rocks, sweet as Carolina, tells us where Adams (married to the actress Mandy Moore) is at these days. On the graceful chorus, he sings, "And I am not rocks, I am not rain; I'm just another shadow, in the stream, that's been washed away, after all these years." It's a poignant gesture, in defence of soul and of human weakness.
"It's a message to myself that it's okay to be vulnerable, and that I'm not an element," he explains. "It's dealing with the idea that a person can break or bend a little more as they suffer, and that's what it is to be a human being."
Less defiant and less stoic, then. A rebel, not too late, has met his cause.
Adams can be contradictory, though: You can't always take what he says at face value, probably because, like the rest of us, he's still finding his way. In 2007, when we last spoke, he was surrounded by the members of his band at the time, the New York-based Cardinals. He said back then, "People will never get a solo show from me again. I can almost guarantee you that."
This is what he says now: "I just finished three solo tours, and I have to say that they were the most satisfying shows of my career."
So what gives? "It was fun for a while," he says of the early days with the Cardinals. "Admittedly, it became a bit of a chore."
Did he mean what he said when he said it, though, or did he say it because the Cardinals were in the same room during the interview. "Well, as much as I wanted to profess that 'This is what I really want to do,' I almost think I was saying it because I needed to convince myself. In reality, I didn't think the songs were being fulfilled in an elemental enough way."
Adams has made rock 'n' roll records and he's made alt-country records. And last year he released a vinyl-only heavy-metal concept album, Orion. But for the near future, he is dedicated to solo singer-songwriter fare. It's been a wild, often pharmaceutically fuelled ride.
Does he have regrets? Of course not.
"My past experiments have yielded some really great stuff," he says, "but with the new record, I think I understand what I'm doing now. It's funny how much time and effort and work go into failing miserably lots of the time."
And with that, he laughs.
Ryan Adams plays the Winter Garden Theatre in Toronto on Dec. 10.
RYAN ADAMS BY THE NUMBERS
4: Careers, starting with alt-country icons Whiskeytown (1994-2000), then solo (2000-04), then with the Cardinals (2004-09), and now solo again.
2: Ears, affected by Menière's disease, a disorder that causes tinnitus. "When I'm exhausted, I can't hear above certain frequencies. But it's getting better. I take better care of myself now than I did."
1.5: Years he went without writing songs, before penning Ashes & Fire's first song, Dirty Rain.
1: Marriages. Adams tied the knot with singer-actress Mandy Moore in 2009. In the past, he's been linked with singer-songwriters Leona Naess and Beth Orton, journalist Jessica Joffe, actor Parker Posey and the late Carrie Hamilton (daughter of Carol Burnett).
0: Song requests he prefers to hear. "It's disrespectful to the experience, and obstructive to the idea that there was a natural flow to what already was going to happen."
Brad Wheeler