The Globe and Mail

Now explain this to me: Why do so many “green” cars – the electric vehicles and plug-in hybrids that are for sale now and the ones coming soon – look like the automotive equivalent of David Suzuki?

Not that the CBC broadcaster is unpleasant to look at, but I think it’s fair to say Suzuki is no George Clooney or Brad Pitt. He does not wow viewers with his looks; what resonates are his big brain and the earnest delivery.

In a sense, something similar is happening in the car business. Auto companies big and small are so focused on the technology of green cars – the hybrid drive systems, the batteries, the electric motors, the controllers and software that are the “brains” of the things – they seem to have lost sight of something very important: electric vehicles and plug-in hybrids need to grab buyers with their looks.

The cool factor matters. Dull or even ugly car designs do not sell, yet look at what’s coming down the pipeline – an electric version of Ford’s Transit Connect utility van in 2010. The Transit Connect is a pretty functional little commercial runabout, but it’s only beautiful if you’re a plumber who needs space to haul around sinks.

I’m not singling out Ford’s coming electric van, either. The world’s auto manufacturers are now racing to introduce plug-ins and EVs and too many of them are downright boring. Or worse.

For every Fisker Karma EV there is a Nissan Leaf and a Chevrolet Volt. There is nothing special about the styling of the Leaf and Volt. Nothing. You would walk right by if you weren’t interested in the technology under the skin.

Or take what’s coming from Daimler and Toyota. These two car companies are about to start trials of electric versions of the Smart and Prius, respectively, by the end of this year. The most encouraging thing I can about the Smart is that it’s already a familiar design. The Prius is far more noteworthy for its reliability and fuel economy, than its styling. The aerodynamic shape is functional, but not funky or fun.

Or take the Mitsubishi i-MiEV electric car that went on sale in Japan this summer. It’s coming to North America within two years and we should all applaud the technology. But as looks go, the i-MiEV is a four-door version of the Smart.

Most of what we’ve seen so far in green design just does not look particularly good at all. Efficient? Sure. Seductive? There is no chance at all I will be seduced by the shape of a Leaf or a Volt.

Unfortunately, so many of the green cars we’re seeing now – and will be seeing in the future -- look the way they do for very practical reasons.

First, car makers want slippery, aerodynamic shapes that are energy efficient. The Volt’s shape is very efficient and decidedly dull. There is a reason so many green cars share a similar wedge shape with a cut-off rear end: it cuts through the air wonderfully well. But this is not a sexy look.

Second, developing any new car is fantastically expensive. The new wave of environmentally friendly cars is not only costly but risky, too. The underlying technology is new and largely unproven, so manufacturers are gambling – gambling that the nuts and bolts will work as promised and gambling customers will step up and risk buying the new technology at a premium price.

The urge to play it safe with defensive or inoffensive designs is therefore understandable. The innovation in most green cars is under the skin, not the skin itself. What so many car companies seem to be shooting for is a middle-of-the-road look that does not turn off potential buyers. Such designs won’t turn on buyers, either.

It’s a big mistake for car companies to err on the side of cautious but efficient designs. Green cars will only pull in a broad range of buyers if they are efficient, clean, safe, reliable and fun to drive and to look at.

Car buyers will not stampede en masse to buy the automotive equivalent of Birkenstocks.