A humorous look at the companies that caught our eye, for better or worse, this week
Research has shown that the average Canadian spends more time waiting in line at Tim Hortons than talking to his or her spouse. But here’s the good news: Those lineups are getting shorter. In the second quarter, the number of transactions at stores open for at least a year fell slightly, which could be a sign of market saturation, competition or the weak economy. Whatever it was, it went over with investors like a stale cruller.
Dear Sweetheart: Please disregard my last letter in which I asked you to smuggle a birthday cake with a file inside it into the prison, and the letter before that in which I asked for plans to build a bomb capable of blowing a hole in a cement wall. What I really want are shares of prison operator Corrections Corp. of America I figure if the shares keep rising, as they did after second-quarter results beat expectations, I can use the proceeds to bribe a few guards.
"Welcome to Bell. Press 1 for better-than-expected second-quarter earnings. Press 2 for a dividend increase. Press 3 for a higher stock price.” BCE investors were treated to all three this week as Canada’s biggest communications company raised its outlook for the full year, helped by the roll out of Fibe TV, strong wireless results and a solid showing from its media division. If only real voice-mail were this much fun.
Crappy Tire, eh? The only people feeling crappy this week were folks who don’t own Canadian Tire’s stock. Shares of the retailer jumped after second-quarter profit surged 26 per cent, lifted by strong sales at Mark’s Work Wearhouse, FGL Sports and its namesake chain. Maybe the company could spend some of the money to actually hire some staff.
Research In Motion
Great news! RIM shares jumped 18 per cent this week, which means if you bought in at the peak back in 2008, you’re only down 95 per cent! Well, its a start. In a rare bit of cheer for the BlackBerry maker, a California judge overturned a jury’s $147.2-million (U.S.) ruling that RIM had infringed patents of Mformation Technologies. Rumours that IBM is sniffing around RIM’s enterprise-services unit also gave the stock a lift. At this rate, you’ll be back to break-even in no time.