Warning: Spoilers ahead!
The course of true love never did run smooth, but the road was rockier than usual in last night’s finale of The Bachelorette.
In the love-connection series’ final torrid romantic denouement, the soon-to-be-unsingle lady Andi Dorfman was the object of affection of two handsome young suitors.
Andi sent the runner-up home early and then accepted a marriage proposal from her last man standing.
And take note: If you haven’t watched last night’s finale of The Bachelorette, take heed that all spoiler alerts apply from this point onward.
Going into the closer, regular viewers of The Bachelorette were split over which of the two eligible bachelors were the best choice to become Andi’s life partner.
In one corner, there was Nick Viall, an ambitious if impetuously romantic software executive with a penchant for accent scarves. In the other corner, Josh Murray, a former pro baseball player with a dazzling smile and bulging biceps. Decisions, decisions.
But in keeping with her regular duties as an Atlanta district attorney (she took leave to film the series), Dorfman covered all the bases in determining which of the two alpha males were best suited to her particular needs.
And so it began with Andi taking Nick to the Dominican Republic to meet her parents. Nick was understandably a nervous wreck, and perhaps even more so after Andi’s mom, Patti, helpfully pointed out that her daughter and Nick weren’t holding hands. Thanks, Mom!
While in the DR, Nick actually made Andi cry by professing his true love for her.
And while Andi’s parents appeared rather meh about the man courting their daughter, her father, Hy, admitted that he could see Nick as a potential son-in-law.
Next came Josh’s turn to meet Andi’s parents, and it was not uneventful.
Based on first impressions, Andi’s mom immediately fretted that Josh was too loud and boisterous. Andi’s sister Rachel stated her concerns about Josh being too similar to Andi’s previous boyfriends.
Andi’s father, meanwhile, was an easy win: He and Josh were wearing similar outfits – purple-ish shirts and white shorts – which seemed to be all that was required to win the old boy over.
With all parental duties dispensed, it came time for Andi to enjoy one last date with each of her handsome men.
And since they were already in the sparkling blue waters of the Caribbean, why not kick off with a yachting trip?
As per every date on The Bachelorette, Andi’s luxury boat trip with Josh was a case of breathtaking scenery interjected with brief flashes of conversation.
In this instance, Andi finally let go of her persistent hangup about how Josh was too much “her type” (how many ex-jocks has this girl dated anyway?).
To his credit, Josh scored some major points when he gave Andi a baseball card complete with stats about their romance.
Next came Nick’s date with Andi. The couple went on an off-roading excursion, which seemed uneventful but ended with Nick giving Andi a necklace filled with sand from the beach where he first told her he loved her.
In his awkward, perhaps insecure manner, Nick pestered Andi to divulge his place in her heart and repeatedly asked her to assure him he wouldn’t be heartbroken when the dust settled. The word “needy” springs to mind.
Andi was vague, but Nick seemed satisfied with her comment that he was still in the running.
Cut to: Josh meeting with celebrity jeweller Neil Lane to pick out the perfect engagement ring. Nick was just about to do likewise, but instead he received a surprise visit from Andi. You could practically see the terror on Nick’s face.
And Nick had good reason to be worried, given Andi’s habit of eliminating males before they ever get to the rose ceremony. The lady simply knows what she wants, right?
Turns out Nick was right to be worried. In no uncertain terms, Andi told him she felt something “wasn’t right” with them, and said she believed that being with Nick would cause her to “over analyze everything.”
For his part, Nick told Andi he wished she hadn’t gotten his romantic hopes up. Nick looked a tad stunned on his ride to the airport, during which he called himself a “fool.” When you’re right, you’re right, Nick.
And just like that – snap! – Nick was out of the picture and Andi was suddenly permitted to pursue her passion for Josh unfettered.
Next came the lovey-dovey meeting we’d all been awaiting: Josh met with Andi and gushed about her beautiful smile, among other things.
Andi told Josh that she loved him from the moment she saw him and accepted his gracious marriage proposal. Naturally, she gave him the final rose.
The more interesting moments were saved for the After the Final Rose special, in which Josh and Andi revealed they are planning to wed in the spring of 2015.
Back together for the first time in months since taping of The Bachelorette wrapped, Nick and Andi were reunited during the After the Final Rose special and it wasn’t pretty.
In his inimitable dogged way, Nick said he couldn’t accept that Andi never loved him. And then Nick dropped a major bombshell, saying that if Andi didn’t love him, then she probably shouldn’t have slept with him.
Say what now?
Or as Nick put it: “Feeling like you did, if you knew how in love with you I was, why did you make love with me?”
As it turns out, Nick and Andi did more than play backgammon during their allotted time together in the Fantasy Suite. So much for the tradition of what happens in the Fantasy Suite stays in the Fantasy Suite.
But Nick made a good point: If Andi was so head-over-heels in love with Josh, as she claimed, why was she knocking boots with Nick at the first given opportunity?
Andi never really answered Nick’s question, and the tenth season of The Bachelorette wrapped with Andi engaged to her hunky baseball player.
As for living happily ever after, Nick will always have his Fantasy Suite memories.
Ain't love grand?