“[Dads] are less likely to go to the infant groups and the toddler groups and the playgroups. That is changing. … But technology is something men feel very comfortable using and being part of, so it makes sense that they would feel comfortable connecting with other men that way.”
The Web offers distance and anonymity to fathers who may want to keep their anxieties separate from their day-to-day lives, thus transforming other daddy bloggers into advice gurus by proxy.
Doug French, the man behind the blog Laid Off Dad, has been peppered with e-mails from dads who've been laid off during the current downturn. They seem to enjoy the humour and candour with which the Manhattan father of two approached his job loss back in 2003 from a Wall Street equity research company and his subsequent role as stay-at-home dad, he says.
“They would say, ‘I read your blog … and I could tell you were obviously nervous, but for whatever reason there was an equanimity about it,'” he says. “They seem to draw strength from the fact that someone else could do it and then react in this way.”
Now a math teacher at a private high school in New York, Mr. French says he was freaked out yet thrilled by the prospect of becoming primary caregiver to his sons, Robert, now 7, and Luke, 4. Blogging about his transition into staying at home helped him find his voice as a writer, he says, and he's met many great friends through the site.
San Francisco Bay-area blogger Mike Adamick says he recently reconnected with a childhood friend who had been laid off and was looking for a little help in his new role as primary caregiver. Though he's no newbie in the daddy blogosphere, the author of the blog Cry It Out: Memoirs of a Stay-at-Home Dad, says he still learns new things from creative dad bloggers – something he hopes discouraged laid-off dads may tap into.
“You can also read dad blogs and even mom blogs and just get a better idea of ‘Oh wow, I'm having a really frustrating day – that nap didn't go well.' It may be mundane and boring, but you give it a read and you're not alone.”
Seeing a boost in demand for daddy blogs, Joe Schatz started up dad-blogs.com in January. When it started, the site ranked in the top five or six million websites by Google PageRank and Alexa Rank, sites that measure how often a page is linked. Now it's in the top 80,000, says the Havre de Grace, Md., dad – a pretty quick rise for a niche site. The father of three has seen a lot of chatter among dads about how they've been affected by the recession – much of it about how dads can save cash.
Mr. Mattocks says he hoped to make a little money when Clark Kent's Lunchbox became a daddy blog. Though he never made enough to support his family, he did create a book, a collection of essays about his transition from an executive to a stay at home dad called Sugar Milk: What's a Drink When You Can't Afford Vodka? to be published in late summer. Writing about the startling switch and sharing it on his blog was therapeutic, he says.
And like many laid-off dads, Mr. Mattocks doesn't plan to be housebound for long. He recently received accreditation for becoming a high-school English teacher and is looking for jobs in the Chicago area to be near his three biological sons.
“[I'm] hoping to turn it around to where I'm back being the primary breadwinner.”
