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Earlier discussion

Still satisfied with sex? Your questions answered Add to ...

1:09 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

There were a lot of comments to the reader who posted this question online.

1:09 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

One person wrote: take out the garbage more!

1:10 Niamh O'Doherty - A question from Dave in Toronto: My doctor says my testosterone levels seem low, and he has offered me a prescription for a topical cream, but only if he thinks I need it. I’m not sure I do. How do I tell?



1:10 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

That's a simple solution, but for some people, women especially, it can be difficult to feel desire if your head is cluttered with a million different tasks, chores, responsibilities and stressors. If a woman's partner can relieve some of those stressors (i.e. taking out the garbage), she may be opened up to feel more desire.

1:11 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

Good question, Dave. I'm not a medical doctor so can't comment on the specifics of your situation. I'd want to know why the doctor wants to prescribe testosterone. Have you talked with him about low desire or erectile problems?

1:12 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

If you think you can solve those issues without medication, it may be good to try that route first to avoid any side effects of testosterone.

1:14 [Comment From Peggy ]

I'm just wondering, what would be a great product to add in the boudoir that would really help increase sexual enjoyment for women?

1:14 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

Great question!

1:14 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

After we've been in relationships for a long time, we can get into the habit of doing the same thing sexually every time (we know what works, so we keep doing it!).

1:15 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

But there are lots of great products you can buy, inexpensive, without a prescription, which can add a little spice.

1:16 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

The best selling sex toy in Canada and the US is called the We-Vibe. It's a c-shaped vibrator made of medical grade silicone, which is worn during intercourse.

Comment From Robin Milhausen]

The woman can wear it, and it stimulates her clitoris and her g-spot while she is having sex.

1:16 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

There are all kinds of other options, though.

1:17 [Comment From LookingLongTerm ]

I'm not 40, but thinking about what my relationships might look like 10, 20, 30 years later. I've seen fictional stories on television where couples apparently love each other, but are candid with each other about having sex with others. This is a plot device, of course, but does this happen often successfully in reality?

1:18 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

Experimenting with different lubricants can be fun, especially as women age they may have more problems with vaginal dryness. There are lots of different environmentally friendly, vegan, biodegradable lubricants available now too. And you can buy them at the drug store, you don't have to go into a sex shop if you aren't comfortable.

1:18 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

Lookingforlongterm - hold that thought for a second.

1:19 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

I would also recommend couples or individuals look into having "boudoir" photos taken to share with their partner. More and more photographers are offering these kinds of services. Just make sure you go to someone reputable (check their portfolio, and references).

1:20 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

Lookinglongterm: couples are are not sexually exclusive do exist in the real world.

1:20 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

They have usually made agreements with eachother about what kinds of sex and with who is acceptable.

1:21 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

Sometimes they swap partners, or bring new partners into their bedroom, sometimes they just see other people.

1:21 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

It's not easy to navigate these kinds of relationships. Jealousy is often an issue. But those who are polyamorous (means "loving more than one") say it gives them pleasure knowing their partner is happy being loved by someone else.

1:22 [Comment From Robin Milhausen]

The idea that one person can meet all of our needs, sexually, emotionally, intellectually etc. etc. etc. may be unrealistic. It's a lot of pressure to put on one person.

1:24 [Comment From k ]

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