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A 220 sq. ft. "micro" house prototype in Vancouver, B.C.LAURA LEYSHON/The Globe and Mail

How would you like an affordable apartment in a cool neighbourhood? Here's the catch: It's 200 square feet. Please don't belittle this dream home as a "shoebox" or a "prison cell." Developers and agents have fabricated a more charming phrase: "micro-housing."

Let's turn now to the stress-inducing career trend where people hold dozens of different jobs, often at the same time. This isn't contract, part-time or unreliable employment that never pays enough to get ahead. These are "micro-careers," held by ambitious, fictitious go-getters.

"Micro" doesn't mean cute, or fashion-forward. It means small. Micro-financing, micro-unions, micro-bags: These are all lazy euphemisms for laughably small loans, ineffective workers' rights groups and luxury purses designed by Fendi for tiny humans with too much money. Let's stop hiding behind an infantilizing buzzword and own up to these serious problems.

However, micro-pigs are adorable. They can stay.

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