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Rodney's By Bay

56 Temperance St., Toronto

416-703-5111

http://www.rodneysbybay.com

If I were to die and go to heaven (which is not, according to some restaurateurs, assured), it would contain an oyster bar and I'd be able to run up a big tab. My love for raw oysters is such that, every year, my birthday celebration centres on a case of raw oysters at home. Both of my children were taught to shuck oysters pretty soon after they learned to ride a two-wheeler; such is the position of the oyster on my priority list.

So I have a predisposition toward oyster bars. And Rodney's By Bay, an "oyster saloon" that opened near Bay Street in March, has a credible pedigree. One of the city's premier oyster mavens, Rodney Clark of Rodney's Oyster House, gave his blessing when staffer John Belknap left the mother ship after five years to launch it. And Rodney's By Bay looks every inch an oyster bar, with thick wooden tables and a big rectangular bar with a marble top.

Opening it around the corner from Bay Street makes Belknap crazy like a fox. Anyone who doubts whether the Street is surviving this recession intact ought to spend the after-work hours there any weeknight. Every table is crowded with suits sucking back expensive bivalves and lubricating them with (also expensive) amber liquid. The raw oysters go for an average of $3 each, which adds up to $36 per dozen. Inhale a dozen or two oysters, add some alcohol and you just spent $200 for two. And you're still hungry.

Which is why they have to sell cooked food, too. More on that anon. For habitués of the yummy ugly bivalve, the selection depends on the day. Typical offerings might include Merigomish from Nova Scotia, Rappahannock from Virginia, Totten from Washington, Kumamoto from Japan and Mystic from Connecticut. Which should you get?

Ask for three of each and play the compare and contrast game. By the end of your dozen (or two), you will be thoroughly confused - and have had lots of fun.

Neophytes tend to smother their oysters in cocktail sauce, but those of us who adore bivalves tend to prefer them unadulterated. My favourite method of enjoyment is to drop a few shreds of freshly grated horseradish on an oyster, squeeze a lemon wedge over it (with judicious restraint) and inhale.

When I was young and sensations came cheaper, I used cocktail sauce. But, like, why? One might as well pour it on iceberg lettuce as do that gustatory harm to something as delicate as an oyster. With its oysters, Rodney's By Bay brings a range of possible toppings, including the aforementioned cocktail sauce, shallots in red wine vinegar, smoky hot sauce and four-alarm hot sauce.

Oyster bars tend not to have great cooked food, and this one is no exception. It does, however, have unusually lofty ambitions, offering the likes of deconstructed BLTs and lemon risotto. As my father would have said when he meant anyone to stop doing something they were doing, "take the needle out."

The only non-oyster food that's credible isn't cooked. Trio of tuna tartares is three cute little piles of raw tuna chunks, each more yummy than the last. One is scented with sesame oil and shiitake mushroom, one with wasabi mayo and one with jalapeno. The accompanying wonton crisps are slightly greasy heaven: wonton wrappers deep fried to a fragile crunch.

When food meets stove, less excitement ensues. New England clam chowder has decent flavour and is not too thick, but does not boast quite enough clams to pack the desired flavour punch. Lobster roll is properly fresh, slightly overcooked lobster meat atop a Parker House dinner roll with overdressed tatsoi greens and a cup of lobster bisque with a paucity of lobster flavour. And seared sea scallops are perfectly gilded scallops atop strong sweet red pepper purée, but the lemon risotto is very ... white.

I am also ambivalent about the oyster BLT. The deconstruction of an iconic comfort food is always iffy. Do I want chefs to screw around with mac 'n' cheese? I don't think so. Same deal with my beloved BLT. This ubermodern rendition is interesting, but ultimately I can't get no satisfaction from such architectural little food: a tiny tower of baked tomato, some frisée lettuce, a paper-thin slice of crisp-fried pancetta and a small fried oyster on top. Each element is impeccable, but the whole is less than the sum of the parts.

Fish and chips, meanwhile, is made with haddock, king of the big white fishes, and we believe it's fresh. But the taste is strangely ammoniac, slightly reminiscent of chlorine. It's in a crisp, non-greasy batter and its accompanying frites are fab, but what's the deal with the deli-style cole slaw with $15 fish and chips?

Actually, it's in keeping with the service, which is affable but painfully slow. Maybe the suits from Bay Street have the right idea: Rodney's By Bay isn't so much a dinner destination as a long, lubricated after-work interlude.Callinectes sapidus: Soft-shell crab season has started, so look for it - deep-fried for a nanosecond - in Chinese and Japanese restaurants.RIP: Mini-Market and Alice's Restaurant, both on College Street, have closed. Cru on Royal York Road has also shuttered its doors.

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