The 84th annual Academy Awards kept to the script last night, with one unbelievable exception. Comedian Sacha Baron Cohen’s publicity stunt for his new movie was one of the few unexpected moments of the show, which doled out awards to the favourites in almost every major category and saw host Billy Crystal cracking the same type of jokes he was making when he last hosted nearly a decade ago.
It was just Crystal harking back to the past, however, with the Academy lavishing awards on Hugo and The Artist, two films not only set in a bygone era but, tellingly, both about that other great Academy obsession, the magic of the movies.
Even if the night’s many montages convinced you the movies truly are magical, the show itself proved that the Academy Awards have run out of sparkle.
Oscar bashing may be the only topic more popular than who wore what on the red carpet, though there are other things people will be talking about come Monday morning.
The dictator walks the red carpet
Sacha Baron Cohen – he of Borat fame and a master of self-promotion – stoked controversy in the days leading up to the Academy Awards when rumours surfaced he was planning on walking the red carpet as General Aladeen, the fictional despot he plays in his upcoming comedy, The Dictator. The Academy frowns heavily on promotional stunts, but their concerns were not enough to deter the British comedian. He walked the red carpet in full military dress and fake beard, carrying an urn with an image of North Korea’s Kim Jong-il on it. During an interview with the E! network’s Ryan Seacrest, Cohen, in character, accidentally-on-purpose spilled the urn’s ashes down the front of Seacrest’s tuxedo. He was quickly escorted away by burly security guards. It was the evening’s one act of unscripted irreverence, and surely the one people will be talking about most come Monday morning.
Billy Crystal is not the Oscar’s savior
The Academy knew what it was getting when it asked Crystal to host. This was his ninth time, after all. And after the fiasco of last year’s failed experiment to appeal to a younger audience with James Franco and Anne Hathaway as co-hosts, it may have seemed like Crystal was a solid choice to revive Oscar’s glory days. Unfortunately, the old routine had lost its magic, with Crystal slinging the kind of zingers that would make Mort Sahl groan. At one point Crystal joked that 82-year-old Christopher Plummer might be seen walking up on stage – because at his age he wanders a lot. One Twitter user got it right when they said Billy Crystal making fun of someone for being old was like Billy Crystal making fun of someone for not being funny.
The presenters
With the exception of J. Lo’s possible wardrobe malfunction (“Nipple or shadow?” asked Gawker.com), none of the celebrities who presented awards offered an moments of humour – none that didn’t come off as embarrassingly forced, that is. Emma Stone was slightly charming playing up her awe of presenting an award for the first time, but Robert Downey Jr.’s faux documentary crew following him around for a movie called The Presenter and his subsequent banter with Gwyneth Paltrow, who pretended to be annoyed by the whole affair, and J. Lo and Cameron Diaz doing some Charlie’s Angels improv were all grating. Those who didn’t try to be funny, such as Colin Firth, who introduced the award for best actress, were passable enough, but hardly memorable. Also, what a waste to have the stars of Bridesmaids reduced to making penis jokes when presenting the best short film – short, get it? Is that really the best they could do?
Short speeches
