Now that the hysteria of election speculation has passed, a new irrelevant obsession seems to be gripping some in the pundit sphere and will no doubt dominate the sherry-sipping conversations of Liberal Party elites for days to come. What is this pressing matter of national urgency you ask? Not to worry, it is not the state of the economy or nuclear non-proliferation. Far more significant than that. The burning question on the minds of oh so many who have nothing better to do today is who answered the door at the White House this morning when Stephen Harper arrived? (Note: It was not Michael Ignatieff as he was playing in an unknown forest.)
The "nothing better to do society" has contrived that Canada has been snubbed because the President didn't answer the door at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Yup, gotta be that. God forbid the President was actually working on, oh say, fighting a war in Afghanistan, plotting economic recovery or maybe trying to sell healthcare. Damn it, he should have answered the door! How rude! No doubt the Prime Minister will be flying back from Washington all in a tizzy tonight, forsaking his congressional meetings because the President didn't turn that door handle. A crushing blow to our relationship.
Mr. Harper and British Prime Minister Gordon Brown can form a mutual support group to manage front-door affronts. You see when Mr. Brown visited the White House in March he suffered the same fate. So wrong!
Like many hard-working Canadians I won't be able to sleep tonight as I'll be riddled with anxiety over this international incident. Certainly, I won't be getting up to answer the door.