MATHEW TREVISAN
Globe and Mail Update Published on Tuesday, Jun. 10, 2008 9:17AM EDT Last updated on Monday, Mar. 30, 2009 3:50PM EDT
Fat chance we'll find many of these gifts waiting at the bottom of the stairs for us this Sunday.
But that's the point: Big Daddy can dream, can't he?
Though he gave up a life of outrageous selfishness years ago, he can still wonder every now and then what a world without a family, a mortgage and real responsibilities would be like. It's kind of like studying the statistical minutiae in baseball: It keeps us occupied for just enough time until reality sets back in.
And not that there's anything wrong with reality. There's just something strangely addictive to wondering what life would be like with a replica of the Star Wars droid R2-D2 projecting the Ali-Frazier fight on your living room wall.
With that, here are 10 gifts for your tech-savvy dad. Unless otherwise noted, prices are in Canadian dollars.
KYODO AMERICA CO.'S LAWNBOTT 3500
Price: $3,349
Lawnbott.com
With this robotic lawn mower, you can utter the phrase, "Sure, honey, I'd love to cut the grass," and then sprawl out on your Muskoka chair, grab a beer, and listen to The Clash — with no repercussions. From its docking station, this Bluetooth-enabled device will follow a perimeter wire around your lawn, do its business, and return when it's finished. The 3500 also has enhanced safety features should you forget a robot is doing your work for you and stumble across its chopping blades.
ADAMS GOLF'S DIXX BLU PUTTER
Price: $439
Adamsgolf.com
The putter with the chest-thumping name will collect data from your wonky stroke and help you correct your swing path, impact position, and club angle. No more shanking putts and wondering what went wrong. It will instantly tell you whether you've hit the toe, the heel or the sweet spot.
SMART GOGGLES
Price: Item not yet available
www.u-tokyo.ac.jp
Forgot where you put your keys? Your wallet? Your infant child? If Yasuo Kuniyoshi, a University of Tokyo professor, eventually gets his way, you'll be able to rely on a pair of glasses, a camera, and a small computer to help find misplaced items. As you train the computer to recognize a certain item, it will be able to recall on the viewfinder the last moments you saw the item, right before your brain fart.
VINTAGE ARCADE SYSTEM
Price: From $2,299 (U.S)
Lolasarcades.com
This one goes out to Father Purist, the video game enthusiast who snorts at Wii Fit and has trouble with controllers that have more than a "jump" button. Lola's will install all your favourites — Ms. Pac-Man, Frogger, Donkey Kong, you name it — on an authentic arcade system. Just don't be embarrassed if, even after you shell out for one of these things, your kids still think the graphics suck.
EPOQ TRIBAND MOBILE PHONE WRIST WATCH
Price: $269.95 (U.S.)
Gadgetcraver.com
For anyone who really, really wanted to be James Bond or Inspector Gadget, here's your phone. Maybe it's a bit inconvenient to use, given that PDAs and smartphones also tell time. But what a treat to finally feel like Bond, pecking away at a touch screen and talking into its receiver. Just remember: you're a family man now — none of that Halle Berry walking out of the water business.
PLASMA BEER MUG
Price: $24.95 (U.S.)
1ofakindstuff.com
You could probably waste hours looking at this thing. The mug's walls are hollow, allowing the charged gas molecules to give off orange plasma streams that follow the touch of your fingers on the glass. A great excuse to drink beer.
SIX LAPS AT THE MARIO ANDRETTI RACING SCHOOL
Price: From $349 (U.S.)
Andrettigordon.com
Book before June 15, and you'll get a free Bluetooth wireless earpiece. Finding that technology angle, however small, was our way of ensuring that the chance to drive six laps in an Indy-style race car at speeds of up to 233 kilometres per hour made our list.
STAR WARS R2-D2 DVD PROJECTOR
Price: $2,900 (U.S.)
Nikkoamerica.com
In a galaxy far away, you won't have to put the seat down after you flush, and your kids will sleep through the night. For all those other times on planet Earth, there's your very own R2-D2. Powered by a remote control Millennium Falcon (how cool is that?), the model droid will project your movies and video games, dock your iPod, and do what R2-D2 does: beep, move forward and backward, and tilt.
THE FOTODIALER
Price: $49.99 (U.S.)
Fotodialer.com
With this accessory to your digital or analog phone, you won't have to worry about remembering your kid's number. Find the picture of the person you want, push the button beside it, and presto: no more awkward jokes about memory loss.
LA-Z-TOUCH MASSAGE RECLINER
Price: $849
La-z-boy.com
What a hard day you've had — playing video games, watching the lawn cut itself, practising your putting stroke. Better put your feet up and let this recliner massage all those kinks out of your back.
Join the Discussion: