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opinion

Moses Znaimer

Moses Znaimer is the founder of ZoomerMedia, president of CARP and executive producer of ideacity, which runs at Koerner Hall in Toronto from June 15 to 17.

Are you a soft-spoken guy?

Yeah, I think my voice is quiet. It doesn't have the edge that the better announcers have in their voice.

Are you a "shusher"?

I don't typically shush other people, but if I'm in a restaurant that makes it impossible to do what I came for, which is eat and talk, I certainly tell the management.

I've thought for years that the boom, boom, boom was stupid and antithetical to the essential purpose of dining. When people say, "Let's have dinner," they typically mean, "Let's talk." To go to a place that makes that impossible undermines the experience.

I've also found that noisy environments homogenize places. If you're in Riyadh or Toronto, it's the same stupid boom, boom, boom - the same decibel level, the same number of beats per minute - and all the effort and money that have gone into reflecting the uniqueness of the establishment, or the uniqueness of the culture, get lost.

Is the problem getting worse or are you getting more sensitive?

Yes, I think it is [getting worse] a stupid, pernicious idea that caught on in the hospitality trade. But the tide has begun turning in up-market restaurants. It has become an issue in New York. Some of the critics are making it an issue in Toronto.

But are you getting worse? More crotchety, less inclined to tolerate things?

That doesn't make you crotchety. It makes them stupid.

How do you define noise pollution in a restaurant or lounge?

If you can't talk to the person across from you, then it's bad. We measure these things. Safe [decibel]levels are in the 60s, the 70s. Once you get past 80, you are in an unpleasant environment. … I'm not saying everybody has to swing into some kind of orthodoxy. Restaurants can pick their clientele. You can push for some sort of trendoid crowd that will leave you for the next trendoid place or you can be an up-market establishment that respects people that are shelling out a hundred bucks a plate.

The point is, restaurants and lounges that position themselves as places where people come to talk should carry through in a consistent way. In any case, the consumer should be warned. People should declare themselves. A restaurant that believes in heavy noise should say, "We're proud to be a heavy noise environment." Don't expect to speak to your dinner party and, if you are trying to get laid, this is not the place.

Are wireless devices contributing to people's desensitization?

I'm sure it's unhealthy. I said 10 or 15 years ago that the next large-scale pollution issue is going to be noise pollution.

Second-hand smoke was discovered to be a huge health risk to wait staff. Could second-hand noise be seen the same way?

I'm surprised they have not risen up in revolt. But sometimes it's the wait staff who are belligerent when you ask them to change. Sometimes they think the music is there for their amusement rather than the pleasure of the client. And there are some places where the whole damn thing is automated.

Are both the diners and the staff prisoners to that?

There are many operations, particularly the chains, where these things are established by corporate policy and on a computer clock.

What about the power of the market? A restaurant serving lousy food will lose customers and word-of-mouth trade. If a place is intolerably loud, won't it ultimately go out of business?

If you want to cater to kids and if your business lasts, fine. These places have their vogue, then the crowd moves on, whereas a more discerning clientele finds a place they like, that serves good food and pays attention to their wishes, and permits you to have a decent conversation - they'll see return customers.

Are we talking only of programmed music, as opposed to the hubbub of a packed steel and glass and tile dining room? Sometimes, there's an echoing cacophony of conversations in these places.

If it is human conversation, then the problem is much reduced. It may be that the minimalist design aesthetic of recent years contributes, but it is really when you multiply the problem by putting this senseless, meaningless throb behind everything that you bring me to the barricades.

Does broccoli make good earplugs?

I have no idea! Have you tried it? I think if you have to get to earplugs, whether broccoli or anything else, it is time to leave.

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