Jim Fisher, vice-dean at the Rotman School of Management at the University of Toronto, says effective leaders are patient-impatient. They want to get things done quickly, but at the same time anyone who runs any organization of size understands nothing happens quickly. They must patiently repeat a consistent message, edging toward their ultimate goal. “Patience-impatience is the art of an effective leader,” he says.
Of course, he observes, the subordinates that leaders are trying to change are often all too patient. They have seen impatient leaders – with their new initiatives – come and go. They know if they sit tight, “this too shall pass,” as the phrase goes.
Patience shows itself in being willing to listen. “You have something you want to do. You are meeting with the troops. You know the answer. You know where you want to go. But you need to patiently give people a chance to have a voice and express thoughts. People are more willing to accept change if they feel they have a voice,” he says.
How do you learn patience? It comes out of emotional intelligence, he feels – self-awareness. You need to recognize that often you are in a hurry for your own needs – desire for greatness, or trying to deal with your boredom – and must have sufficient self-regulation to move more slowly.
As for the patience to seek work-life balance, he says most leaders he sees rising to the top simply don’t live their life that way. “The road to the top is not a road of good work-life balance. They sacrifice that balance and are impatient to get ahead. I don’t think people who make it to the top are balanced,” he says. At the same time, once at the top, he feels they should have the self-awareness and patience to recognize that not everyone has the same attitude and that to succeed they will need the help of people who prize work-life balance.
Again, a yin-yang for success.
Postscript
To become patient requires effort. To help, Allan Lokos, in his book Patience, offers a series of exercises. They start with taking five minutes every day for a week, sitting quietly, and considering your motivations for becoming more patient. Don’t impose reasons on yourself because they seem “right.” Examine your personal experiences, look deeply at yourself, and reflect on your life and relationships. Consider how your impatience affects others. Ask yourself – and answer truthfully – whether it would be worth the effort to become more patient. “At this point just ask the questions. Let the answers come when they are ready,” he says. Be patient.
