Respect your dog’s routine. Before bringing your dog into the office take your pooch for a nice long walk and give her a bite to eat.Vivienstock/Getty Images/iStockphoto
Dear Corporate Governess
I wanted to bring my beagle Clyde to work but wasn't allowed. Now my boss is bringing in some cat he rescued. What's up with that?
—Henry P., Vancouver
Dear Henry
This may be just what your boss needs for a change of heart in Clyde's favour. Beagles are sociable, making him a good candidate for the office. But don't pack your briefcase with dog biscuits just yet. While many companies allow employees to bring their pets to work—17% in the U.S. according to a 2008 American Pet Products Association survey, which also cites benefits such as increased productivity, decreased absenteeism and happier employees—there are caveats. Pet-friendly doesn't mean all pets are equal. If you worked at Amazon or Google, you'd be okay: They blatantly discriminate in favour of dogs over cats (Google decided that cats would get "stressed out" by visiting).
Your boss may favour a cat-only workplace—possibly only his cat—with good reason. Cats don't like dogs, or other unfamiliar cats for that matter. So before you can convince the boss of Clyde's added value, you'll have to persuade him that your dog can play it cool around a feline. Whether Clyde gets to become your work buddy ultimately depends on your boss's cat. You can't expect the entire office to live in a war zone waiting for these two to cozy up.
As a concession, you might ask for something like canine Fridays, giving the cat the rest of the week. I'd go for it. At my house, with two rescue felines, the bichon frise is lucky to get a corner of her own bed.
Dear Corporate Governess
In these tough times, the company doesn't want to pay for a holiday party. I'm a middle manager who's already springing for things and really don't want to pay for an office lunch. Do you think I need to bite the bullet or will employees understand?
—Rebekka B., Toronto
Dear Rebekka
We need to remember Scrooge here, the ghost of Christmas past by his side, in my favourite film version of A Christmas Carol, starring Alastair Sim. As his first employer, the jolly Mr. Fezziwig, gallops past, Scrooge bounces on the verge of a jig, a grin lighting up his face, utterly transforming him.
Scrooge: "I was apprenticed here. ...Was there ever a kinder man?"
Ghost: "And yet, what does this party cost him in your mortal money? Three or four pounds at most. Is that so much that he deserves your praise?"
Scrooge: "Oh, but it's not that...the happiness he gave his clarks and apprentices and everyone who knew him...it was as great as if...it had cost a fortune."
As the penny drops, Scrooge wishes he could talk with overworked, underpaid Bob Cratchit.
Employees will say they understand but still be bummed out in the same way you resent your company for putting you in this spot. So be cheap but creative. It can be as simple as taking everyone out for drinks, or perhaps you could bring in some cheese, fruit and wine. Add a holiday card with a handwritten note inside to thank each person for their work. It may trigger your own epiphany, ghosts optional.