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Their treasure, your burden

ADRIANA BARTON

From Tuesday's Globe and Mail

Latest comment posted at 1:08 PM EDT 09/10/07

What do you do when you end up with Pop's prized stamps? Inheritors are looking for new and creative ways to rid themselves of the cherished collections left behind ...Read the full article

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  1. Kay Ay from Canada writes: This is so timely! My parents just sold their house (to move to another province) and emptied it of 30 years of um, junk.
    I'm so thankful they have moved house now in order to cut down on what will need to be tossed out in 20 years or so when the next house has to be emptied.
    The only thing I want saved is my mother's writing and we (hopefully) have years to work on that.
  2. T J from Canada writes: I recently offered my son my beaver collection. I haven't heard back from him!
  3. RD Lone from Vancouver, Canada writes: Moral of the story is not to collect junk.

    Is your collection something that people will remember you by? Something that is tombstone worthy? If not, invest into something more liquid like precious metals (if you want a physical store of value to hand down). As mentioned in the article, basically your junk is a massive headache for whoever inherits it.
  4. Delaney Murphy from Toronto, Canada writes: The presumptive bias of Canadian media and journalists always astounds me. I am quoting directly from the article: 'The generation that endured wartime shortages is leaving its boomer heirs to deal with the consequences of their packrat tendencies.'

    That paragraph positively BLEEDS presumtion, bias and is 'whiney' in the extreme! The 'generation that endured wartime shortages' is NO likelier to have become manic collectors than any generation which preceded or succeded theirs.

    Oddly enough, I 'inherited' my mother's collection of decorative commemorative plates which she had collected over a 60-year period. When Mother passed away, my wife and I didn't know what to do with these plates, though we recopgnized their worth. Coincidentally, my eldest son was unloading all manner of possessions through e-Bay. Guess what? Those plates netted us over $38,000 in e-Bay sales in less than six months.

    So if any of you whining, chronic complainers inherit a 'collection' of anything from your parents, please post how your paents victimized you with a 'collection of X' right here, okay? I will GLADLY take on the 'burden' your poor loving parents left their ingrate spawn.
  5. Bill Needle from Canada writes: Nice post Delaney.
  6. Delaney Murphy from Toronto, Canada writes: Bill Needle:

    Thank you, Bill. Sometimes I think the 'media' need a good spanking. This was one of those times.
  7. snow lander from Edmonton, Canada writes: We inherited a victorian piano. Actually it wasn't even inherited, my mother in law complained that she didn't want to have her grandmothers piano taking up space in her house anymore. I guess my wife and I felt more guilty about it not staying in the family so we said we would look after it knowing full well it wasn't playable hadn't been tuned for 40 years and had structural damage since sitting in a unheated warehouse in Quebec for for 10 years. She thanked us over and over saying how important it was that the piano stayed in the family. We have shipped this thing back and forth across the country because we don't have what it takes to get rid of a great grandmothers old piano. sigh.
  8. Lord Jim from New York, United States writes: Like you, Delaney Murphy, I find that the media IDENTIFY new reasons for the whining, complaining under-40 crowd to continue the whining and complaining they have whined and complained about since the day their sorry a$$es came into the world.

    Are you older and a collector? Have kids? LEAVE THE KIDS NOTHING and leave your 'collection' to friends and neighbours - even if they end up thriowing your collections out. Undeserving whining and complaining adult children should be ignored at every opportunity.
  9. J Planet from Montreal, Canada writes: There was nothing whiny about this article. It was both a tongue-in-cheek commentary on the quirky collection habits of our parents and relatives, and a compassionate view on the challenge (and often, burden) of being the inheritor and trustee of such collections after the parent passes on. It is a relationship of trust, and trying to do the right thing, especially while you are grieving, can be agonizing. Even in sorting out your deceased parents' clothing and other personal belongings, there's a feeling of betrayal that comes when you (as you inevitably must) throw things out. I've spent the last three years sorting through fifty years of my parents' belongings after they passed away eight months apart, and it was excrutiating trying to make the right decisions.

    What the article didn't address is how we deal with the more mundane and less valuable collections of our Depression- and war-era pack-rat parents: the warranties and original packing boxes carefully saved from every single appliance, large and small, bought over the last thirty years; the carefully-folded newspaper collection dating to 1989; the endless prescription pill bottle containers filled with safety pins, stashed in various places around the house (you never know when your zipper might break in the basement or the kitchen); the drawers of yogurt and margerine containers (and their misfitting lids); the bits of string, twine, rope, and tie-tape that your father has carefully squirreled away in every drawer of his desk....This is the material evidence of lives lived carefully, with prudence and economy. Poignant and funny at the same time.
  10. David N from Toronto, Canada writes: My siblings and I inherited a large stamp and coin collection more than 25 years ago and it took many years to get organized to the point where we were ready to sell anything. We were astounded at how large the bid/offer spreads are in the coin and stamp markets - in many cases a dealer wil only offer you half of what they'd agree to sell you the same thing for. Eventually we learned two things: 1) you have to spend some time educating yourself or else you'll get hosed; and 2) it makes sense to break up collections and sell them to retail collectors on a piecemeal basis, look for local clubs hosting trade meets, buy a spot and be patient!
  11. Bill Needle from Canada writes: Good advice David - I'll pass it on to my kids - I'm leaving them my vast collection of assorted lengths of 2x4 studs. I cleaned up after them so much I'm getting even when I pop off.
  12. mondo pinion from Canada writes: I have disposed of my inherited collections ( coins, fancy junk-jewelry, etc) by giving them all to someone who fancied them and would absolutely treasure them, even though they were unrelated to me. Since I did not want to be burdened with them, but it seemed wrong to convert them to mere cash when they had been so special to my loved ones, this seemed the best way, and I always have a good feeling when I happen to think about it.
  13. Barry Moss from Abbotsford, BC, Canada writes: I think that anyone who is a collector needs to recognize that their family may not want to carry on the collection. When I was very young my great uncle passed a stamp collection on to be because none of his children were interested in it.

    Its a good idea to include some ideas of how to properly dispose of your collection if none of your family is interested in your hobby. Take a half and hour and write out the strategy you would use if you needed to liquidate your collection, as well as dealers or appraisers you would trust.

    As David noted in an earlier post, you can often get a better return by breaking up the collection and selling it yourself than by going to a dealer. However, this is a significant effort of time--you will need to learn something about the hobby to recognize what is valuable and what isn't. But recognize that while you may be able to get a quick sale by going to a dealer (particularly for stamps and coins), the dealer makes his living by breaking down those collections which is fairly labour intensive. Dealers also may end up hanging onto parts of a collections for a long time before they will sell. This isn't a business where you can turn your inventory 6 times a year. So that's why the spread is so high.
  14. Vickky Angstrom from Canada writes: Once again the baby-boomers whine about their good fortune. Earth to boomers: it is the price you pay for the inheritance.

    Try to remember that your parents (who you loved and wished happiness for at some point) had a lot of FUN collecting this stuff. It needs no other justification. It is the last thing you will ever do for your folks, so use it as an opportunity to savour the memories.
  15. Vickky Angstrom from Canada writes: To the stamp people: My cousins sold one stamp each from Uncle's collection and bought flats in London. Then they sold one more stamp each and bought cottages. They also helped their folks with every move, drove them places, phoned twice a week and made sure they saw the grandchildren very often. Gee, I wonder why Uncle left them such a nice inheritance?
  16. CD W from Canada writes: My kids already know that the impressionist art is worth big bucks. They know how much the diamonds are worth. The only problem they have, is whether or not this stuff will still be around when I croak. I am thinking sell them one at a time and go to France or Pago Pago.
  17. Michael Manning from Mississauga, Canada writes: Collecting can be a sign of mental disturbance. I know of one fellow who stuffed his basement, attic and garage full of the most pointless stuff and useless junk ever gleaned from a garage sale or a flea market. His family could never get him to stop.

    After his death they found his diary, which they didn't know he kept. In it they found repeated entries describing his intention to spend EVERY PENNY so that his wife and children would be left with nothing.

    I shudder to think of my poor wife having to dispose of my various collections. The books are one thing but who the heck is going to want 25,000 hand-painted 1/72nd scale plastic soldiers?
  18. Sue W from Canada writes: J Planet from Montreal, Canada: Feel free to send those yogurt and margerine containers, with their lids, string, tie-tape to my mother. She's always looking to add to her collection.
  19. MJ Patchouli from Regina, Canada writes: Michael Manning: you're absolutely right about collectors often masking depression -- I do believe hoarding things is a symptom.

    And you raise another important point: why keep a diary of your innermost private thoughts, only to leave it to hurt those in the family?

    Sue W: would your mum like the 874 empty Edwards coffee tins my husband can't seem to part with?

    How's about the broken electronic crap that he might 'Fix' someday (yeah, what with DVD players costing less than $100, I'm sure we're going to need that 80-lb top-loading VCR).
  20. CD W from Canada writes: What do you do with a live cat collection?
  21. tom h from Canada writes: Last year my parents and I emptied out our grandmother's house... it was attached to the old family general store, so it contained about 100 years of garbage that didn't sell over the years. 5 industrial-sized dumpsters later, the house was (almost) empty. What a nightmare!

    (Although, I have to say that the old newspaper with the banner headline 'GERMANY SURRENDERS' was pretty darn cool)
  22. mondo pinion from Canada writes: I think we modern humans carry a lot of atavistic urges from our deep past. Hunting-and-gathering and hoarding/storing are probably instincts which collecting satisfies. I like the people I have known who are collectors. Mostly they are gentle people. Can't help think you lean-and-mean commentors who condescendingly judge the collectors are behaving according to your own ativistic urges -- which are not so harmless.
  23. allcanadian allamerican from ottawa sector of america, Canada writes: Some of you people dont get it. What happens if you need a safety pin, a button or some screws or a few nails or a small piece of string or rope for something? You have to get in your car drive to the nearest mall or hardware store, could be 20 mins away, just to buy a few screws or ribbons. The you use two screws and throw the rest in the garbage. This is greedy capitalism gone insane.
  24. Dano Garv from Peterborough, Canada writes: Before my grandpa was moved to a nursing home, he finally told me about his war time past. He shared his stories and then gave me what he had left. His flight gear of which only the leather helmet and one glove was left. He told me how the other glove is long lost somewhere in Goose Bay Labrador, when the call came over the radio that the war was over, he tore off a glove and through it out the back of his bolingbroke target tug. He also gave me a huge amount of pictures from that time. I pored over everything for nearly two years before I contacted the Hamilton warplane museum and donated some relevant pictures, and contacted the local Legion and donated his helmet and glove and passed on the story about the missing glove. These items were greatfully accepted and now on display for everyone to see. If I had kept them, only I would be able to enjoy the history my grandpa shared with me. I still feel a bit guilty but at the same time, I have shared a small part of history with many people. There are still pictures, people and places I don't know, but I keep them because they don't take up much space and they connect me to a time when my grandpa was young and strong. Even saving a small part of the collection honours the person who gave it to us.
  25. Lotus Land from Victoria, Canada writes: allcanadian allamerican from ottawa sector of america, Canada........

    Am I missing your message?
  26. interested observer from Victoria, Canada writes: Never is the statement "one man's garbage is another man's gold" (or vice versa!) so applicable!
  27. Rae Vandenberg from Canada writes: After observing the difficulties older people have when they become incapable of managing their affairs, I have two pieces of advice. 1) Move into the house you intend to live in when you're really old at the age of 55 (and make sure there are no stairs). 2) Put all your financial and storage/junk affairs in order at the age of 65 so children (often daughters who have full-time jobs) won't be terribly burdened if you were to die suddenly.
  28. Andrew E from Canada writes: Anybody inherited a whack of pre-64 Winchesters, and you don't have the requisite paperwork?
  29. J Planet from Montreal, Canada writes: Dano Garv: Thank you for the beautiful story.

    Sue W: I'm afraid I can't. Some of those containers date to my childhood. They have sentimental value! (Besides, I need them to store all the pieces of twine, rope, etc. in ).
  30. gord winters from Canada writes: those of you that had the past can give the stuff to those of us that care about people, history and humanity.

    you can go back to shopping for britany spears DVDs.
  31. Dennis sinneD. from Calgary, Canada writes: I'd buy it from my father's estate and start drinking.

    It would have to last quite some time, no? That's a lot of liquor.

    Then, sell the empties on eBay.
  32. Midtown Bob from Toronto, Canada writes: Delaney Murphy wrote: "Those plates netted us over $38,000 in e-Bay sales in less than six months." Careful what you type, the CRA may be sending you a GST bill for $2,300.

    Thankfully, the only stuff my parents collect is dusty old junk. I wonder how much I could get for the golf clubs my mom bought at Consumers Distributors in the early 70's?
  33. Ryan Ginger from ottawa, Canada writes: A good rule of thumb is: don't presume what you collect today will have value tomorrow. Collecting has its own pleasures, enjoy them.

    We tend to hear about the extreme upper ends--the stamp collection that netted two London flats, for instance. But most collections have painfully little monetary value. This can be quite disturbing for the heirs, or the collectors themselves, who often over inflate their collection's values. This will lead to ridiculous situations, such as Mr. White's, where he won't give the collection away because his father wanted his grandchildren to benefit financially from its sale. What benefit???
  34. MJ Patchouli from Regina, Canada writes: Ahh, Consumer's Distributors: I remember that place!

    Hilarious -- every gawky zit-faced 18-year old was an "assistant manager.

    I remember looong waits between writing down the product number and having it brought from "behind."
  35. J. Coffey from Toronto, Canada writes: Oh yes, what a burden...to be left the most important collection belonging to one of the people who loved you most. I can't think of anything more heartbreaking or troublesome.
  36. David C from Canada writes: I've experienced this when my father passed away a number of years ago. I inherited his lifelong collection. However, my father did a very smart thing: he spent just as much time sharing his collection with me growing up as he did collecting the stuff. As a result, for better or worse, I have the same bug now.

    Disadvantages: I have a large family and a small house - the collection takes up a large size room; leather, metal, cloth and wood all require upkeep and maintenance; I worry about leaving the house ungaurded when on vacation; I spend time I don't have going through the many items.

    Advantages: we always had something to talk about; memories; meeting up with his fellow collectors and learning from them; developing an area of true expertise and knowing a bargain when I see it; $$$ - I wouldn't sell it unless I was starving, but it is easily valued into the six figure range.

    In regards to the bottle collector in this article, I do think it is unfair for the father to make his collection his son's "problem", given the logistics and conflicting emotions it would bring with it. Time willing, the best thing to do would have been to cull the collection down to perhaps the rarest and most valuable pieces - perhaps a few dozen. Then his son would have both memories, value, and the ability to keep his father's lifelong hobby wherever he was. I will probably start to do this in a decade or two in anticipation for my eventual moving on. Quality and scarcity always holds its value, whether it be vehicles, comic books, or minature bottles.

    PS: Andrew E: sorry, only some really interesting '73's, '76's, Sniders etc..
  37. Bill Needle from Canada writes: snow lander from Edmonton, Canada - my sympathies to you that you are subjected to such pressure from the family over a few hundred pounds of old wood and metal. They are very selfish people.

    I would suggest that you take a photograph and send a copy to all that you know and scrap the useless instrument. Iwould do it in a heartbeat and to he!! with the consequences.
  38. Veronica Klein from Canada writes: I
  39. Southside Guy from Edmonton, Canada writes: I predict in 20 years when the baby boomers get to the casket boomer stage, their children will be burdened with a massive Beanie Baby collection.
  40. David Stanley from montreal, Canada writes: I got a cpllection of brand new stamps from my Grand pa from 1800's to 2006 many dumplicates involved as well
    what do you do with that?
  41. Delaney Murphy from Toronto, Canada writes: David Stanley:

    Visit a philatelist shop and get estimates. E-bay is a greta sales tool. You just might be sitting on hundreds of thousands of $$$. Check into it.

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