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What women want: 'Better sex'

REBECCA DUBE

From Thursday's Globe and Mail

Latest comment posted at 8:35 AM EDT 24/07/08

When Australia's foremost sexpert asked thousands of women about their sexual secrets, she learned there's no such thing as normal ...Read the full article

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  1. Tinfoil Hatt from Lovepuppy, Canada writes:
    ' But then others said it was kind of great because now they have this tape their husband can look at instead of looking at porn starring some random strangers.'

    What a laugh! And what about all the random strangers that will end up looking at that little porn gambit? There are entire websites full of 'home movies'--I wonder how many of those participants are aware that they have become Internet porn stars?

    As for the husband restricting his porn viewing to family shots, that's even more naive. But if that's what the husband had to promise, well ...

    LOL!
    >>>
  2. Belle Kurve from Canada writes: Interesting assessment though it is probably not refelective of women across generations tilted in favour of younger, probably more active and media sensitive females.

    Anyway perhaps one reason woman don't always communicate what they want in bed is because they don't know exactly what they want - each sexual experience is different with all the excitement and potential letdown that entails.

    Men pretty well know exactly what they want each and every time.
  3. Shane Thompson from Pickering, Canada writes: Wow those stats are pretty sad. What a pitty.
  4. pants 7 from Japan writes: As a man, all I can say is, who cares.
  5. David any from North Pole, Canada writes: Ho,Ho ,Ho! Seems I missed a couple of bad Girls on my Christmas list!
    Can you forward the address of the Zorro and Santa Claus Questionnaires?
  6. Alberto Bayo from Canada writes: This matters?
  7. B D from Canada writes: pants 7 from Japan writes: As a man, all I can say is, who cares.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    How about HALF of the population...???
  8. Belle Kurve from Canada writes: B D from Canada writes: pants 7 from Japan writes: As a man, all I can say is, who cares.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    How about HALF of the population...???

    disagree - if you can keep that extra spring in a woman's steps - you will be a happy man for life
  9. Craig Cooper from Toronto, writes: What a farce!

    People always lie about sex anyway.

    Those not getting any say they get a lot for fear of what others will think.

    Those getting busy frequently say they are getting less for fear of what others will think.

    No science here.

    Now if you'll excuse me, Angelina and Monica are waiting for me in the boudoir.
  10. Ex Canadian from Clearwater, United States writes: B.S.
  11. B D from Canada writes: Belle Kurve from Canada writes: B D from Canada writes: pants 7 from Japan writes: As a man, all I can say is, who cares.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    How about HALF of the population...???

    disagree - if you can keep that extra spring in a woman's steps - you will be a happy man for life
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Too true Belle! I ammend my previous post: 'How about ALL of the population...??'
  12. Mr. Justice from Anytown, Canada writes: Is THIS the 'Thursday Victim Article' for the week ? Just asking.
  13. Edwin Green from NS, Canada writes: If you dont care the little woman will have a lot more headakes so if you just think is wam ban thank you mam you will pay through the nose for it
  14. ki from Toronto from Toronto, Canada writes: Gentlemen, stop looking at your wives as the mother of your children and make love to her the way you used to. Go home after work, buy her flowers sometimes, and never take her for granted. It's really quite simple.
  15. wilson ruiz from Germany writes: From a male perspective this is my motto when engaged in sex: 'It's not how big you make it but how you make it big.'
  16. Jo L from Moncton, Canada writes: It never ceases to amaze me at how immature adults can be when commenting on an article about sex.
  17. Tax me! I'm Canadian. I'll roll over! from Canada writes: :
    Wow. Reading this article sure brought me back. I remember the first time I had sex. I was scared...and all alone. ;-)

    Hopefully, this made your morning laugh!
  18. Thursday Afternoon from Canada writes: These numbers are clearly the fault of the Paul Martin Liberals!
  19. Peter V from Calgary, Canada writes: @Tax Me...

    Yes, yes it did. Haha!
  20. J L from Toronto, Canada writes: The stat I find most amazing/disturbing is that 57 percent of woman fantasize about being with another woman.

    As a hetero male I honestly can't relate at all to someone being gay (not that there is anything wrong with that) but I have noticed that many women I meet seem to be more open to lesbian experiences - this article seems to back up my observations.

    I wouldn't want a serious relationship with any girl who goes both ways... but that's just me - maybe most people don't care. I'm just throwing it out there to see what other hetero guys might think if they knew their spouse (not including short term- relationships) was into that. I just think it may be a little weird knowing that your wife is into chicks.
  21. A B from Saskatoon, Canada writes: It's funny that reading comments to this article, explained to me why other (political) G&M forum discussions are strangely politically biased to one side. Either lot of posters on the top are old or dysfunctional ...

    Interesting stats from the article, not totally unexpected.
  22. Henry Allen from East Bank, Don River, Canada writes:
    Smartest approach for men: Earn her trust, ask her what she really likes, then give it to her.

    Are most men that smart? Nope. Most men approach sex like they do when driving in new territory. They're insecure about appearing unmanly if they ask for directions.
  23. Bruce Banner from Toronto, Canada writes: Quote of the day:

    'Oh, I'm a 21-year-old girl and my favourite thing is to give guys oral sex and I love it so much I actually had to quit my job because I didn't have time to give oral sex as much as I wanted to.'

    LOL!
  24. Josua Cord from Courtenay, Canada writes: Definition of Australian foreplay: 'Brace yourself Sheila!!!' Expalins everything in this article.
  25. John Doucette from manotick, Canada writes: As to the researchers statement that North American data would be similar. Ibelieve it would be inverted.
  26. Cognitively Cogitative from Canada writes: Sex in the city is a ditzy show with no basis in reality.
  27. voosh fran from Toronto, Canada writes: How come my name is omitted from the fantasy partner list! I am frequently told that I am way before Buble but after Bronson
  28. B A from Ottawa, Canada writes: What made me laugh is the complaint that women don't talk to each other about their sexual preferences and that this is somehow debilitating. Um...neither do men and I, for one, am exceedingly grateful for it. Lord, can you imagine....'Ok, Vern, what youse all wanna do is git down thar nice 'n low....' Seriously? Ick.
  29. Titus Andronicus from Canada writes: The way the SATC women talked about sex, and their seeming obsession combined with their seeming ineffectualness (except the s1utty one) always struck me as indicative of a very very immature relationship with the subject.
  30. Are We Having This Conversation Again from Toronto, Canada writes: I really liked the comment of David from North Pole....that made me laugh out loud!
    Thank you for the smile on my face!
    Interesting article....I lived in Aus for 3 years and I noticed that most Aussies are very forward when it comes to sex. It is not taboo to them, at least to the guys....mind you, I was there during my uni years and let's face it.....in university....well....it's uni!
    It's too bad more women aren't more vocal about what they want during sex. As adults, we should be more open about it....if a woman wants something, then she should ask for it!
    **ki from Toronto from Toronto: I am not sure if you were joking when you posted your comment, but that was a very mature and thoughtful comment! Good for you for thinking that way! Good on ya' mate!
  31. carol c from Canada writes: 'The stat I find most amazing/disturbing is that 57 percent of woman fantasize about being with another woman.'

    I believe Kinsey first covered the notion of most people being somewhere on the scale of bisexual. Within this society women are more commonly objects of sexuality than men. Pick up a women's magazine and the images of sexually attractive, scantily dressed women outnumber the ones of men by a longshot. Lesbianism is much more acceptable within our society than male homosexuality. So probably more women than men are open to same sex experiences as it is more acceptable and more promoted within society.

    Aside from that I think a majority of men find 2 women together an attractive idea. I'm not sure that holds true of women.
  32. pants 7 from Japan writes: All of the research may be correct but the assumption that all woman are like Australian woman is not. I spent a year in Australia and found the Australian woman to be 'dead lays' and lacking of all feminine charm even though they looked okay. Apologies to the Australian researcher but the Canadian woman I knew when I was single were NOT like Australian woman at all. Or perhaps the problem is how Australian woman judge men; all they care about is his shoes. Where a nice pair of black shoes in Australia and one must beat the woman back with a stick. Australian woman are satisfied by a man's shoe, Canadian woman are not.
  33. Mr. Coffee from Victoria, Canada writes: 100 bucks says Oprah is secretly behind this. After all, anything that Deepak Oprah does must be obeyed after the free gift with purchase.

    As for the better sex, make your woman's heart sing and you might spend more time doing the Horizontal Mambo instead of the 'Hand Solo'...ha ha ha.
  34. Greg Van Zandt from Canada writes: 'Oh, I'm a 21-year-old girl and my favourite thing is to give guys oral sex and I love it so much I actually had to quit my job because I didn't have time to give oral sex as much as I wanted to.'

    Why hello there!
  35. Hydrogen Bob from Toronto, Canada writes: Henry Allen stated: 'Smartest approach for men: Earn her trust, ask her what she really likes, then give it to her.'

    That is the absolute truth. And if I can add to that. Women are generous in bed. If they are having more fun, so will their partners.
  36. Peter The Not Quite Great from Edmonton, Canada writes: An internet 'survey' isn't worth a second look unless the researcher collects enough data to see how close the survey respondents match the general population.

    I see no indication that this 'sexpert' did that so she has no idea if her sample is randomly selected and representative, key factors in making any survey research statistically meaningful.

    The problem with internet surveys is that they are 'self selecting' - that is people with a problem/complaint/strong opinion are likely to participate while those who don't will probably ignore it. So this internet survey, like most others, can be ignored, it's (probably) not worth the paper it's written on.
  37. J Lee from Canada writes: The daily sex article from the Globe and Mail. It frankly gets a bit boring my dear. But again I wonder - if it weren't for orgasms would men even want women?
  38. Keystone Provincial from NOT Winnipeg, Canada writes: Yawn. People don't communicate with eath other. People don't know what they want. Sexuality is not the same as sexualization. Something as deeply fulfilling and gratifying as a physical relationship is still a problem in the WASPY world. Boo hoo. Now, if we had an article that said something different, that would be news!
  39. carol c from Canada writes: 'if it weren't for orgasms would men even want women?'

    I think they maybe appreciate that birth thing, and that nuturing deal too. Maybe some even like women's company.
  40. Amanda Secord from Montreal, Canada writes: Anyone who's ever studied statistics would know that the author's method is absolutely flawed. What the author has collected is called a voluntary sample. Guess who's more likely to volunteer for an online sex survey and complain they need better sex? Why of course you guessed right: women who are not happy with their sexuality.

    I'm surprised the globe and mail didn't use more scrutiny in the interview with the author. If you don't believe me, I have an online survery for you to fill. I'll only use the results to write an absurd book, promise!
  41. Michael Sharp from Victoria, Canada writes:

    What women want...?

    Me.

    Ya baby.
    That's what I'm talking about.
  42. Sawchuck 30 from Far Away From the GTA, Canada writes: J L from Toronto, Canada writes: The stat I find most amazing/disturbing is that 57 percent of woman fantasize about being with another woman.

    As a hetero male I honestly can't relate at all to someone being gay (not that there is anything wrong with that) but I have noticed that many women I meet seem to be more open to lesbian experiences - this article seems to back up my observations.

    I wouldn't want a serious relationship with any girl who goes both ways... but that's just me - maybe most people don't care. I'm just throwing it out there to see what other hetero guys might think if they knew their spouse (not including short term- relationships) was into that. I just think it may be a little weird knowing that your wife is into chicks.
    ===

    You're kidding, right? Right? You do know that most surveys of men's sexual fantasies shows chick-on-chick action as the most common one?

    You clearly have very little experience with women if you think a woman in tune with her own sexuality is to be avoided.

    You have my sympathies.
  43. Robert` Gibbons from Toronto, Canada writes: THIS IS REALLY SURPRISING. I get a kick out of these so called sexperts. They are always women, they always look at sex only from a female perspective, and 'good sex' seems to always be- 100%, the responsibility of the man. Well, having had sex with many different women and having experienced great sex and mediocre sex, I can tell you that MOST WOMEN NEED TO LEARN ABOUT WHAT WORKS FOR MEN! We seem to have a cultural obsession with 'what men do wrong' in virtually all aspects of life. But without going there and focusing on sex let me just look at a few examples: If round one with your man was just getting hot when he climaxed and you want more-which of course you do- take some inititiative...you'll be well rewarded. Don't expect it to happen by magic. I've been with women who didn't get me to a second round, and I was once with a women who managed to get 6 rounds out me with skill imagination and effort. And it was amazing. Porn unfortunately is far to smutty for most women. We need more tasteful porn so that (some) women will watch and learn some skills. Sex should be sweaty, and wild and with abandon. Many women can't let themselves go and they have to be in total control...this is one of the reasons many don't have orgasms...they can't just let go and relax...they have 'control issues.' If men need some advice it's working on getting a women to relax before working on the mechanics of providing orgasmic experiences. The control issues is an epidemic that will be talked about and written about more and more as it gets worse. I watched the movie Juno last night...Jennifer Garner's character reminded me of most women I know these days...total control freak. The pendulum of power has swung too far to the other side in many ways I think it's effecting women more negatively than it is men.
  44. Clive Gingell from Canada writes: Are We writes: I noticed that most Aussies are very forward when it comes to sex.
    ................

    Foreplay in OZ: 'Brace yerself sheila.'
  45. Belle Kurve from Canada writes: Tax me! I'm Canadian. I'll roll over! from Canada writes: :
    Wow. Reading this article sure brought me back. I remember the first time I had sex. I was scared...and all alone. ;-)

    Hopefully, this made your morning laugh!

    ___________

    Well at least it was with someone you love!

    you and I should both apologise to Woody Allen for that one and yours.
  46. Clive Gingell from Canada writes: Ooops, guess I should've read Josua's comment before I posted.
  47. right elbow from TORONTO, Canada writes: Ok gals (not you guys) come on down, ask and you'll get iiiiiiiit!
  48. Anger Equals Danger from Canada writes: Tom Cruise as a fantasy partner ? . . . .really?
    No thanks!
  49. Wandering Willy from Kelowna, Canada writes: I believe I have been saying all along.......when you meet someone be open about your sexual preferences and if its a match you will be so very much happier going forward. Open communication is really where it is folks! I am curious why a few posters (men) are disturbed by the number of women that fantasize about being with other women. I actually think the number is a little low to be honest.....you would be surprised how many women are into or have dabbled in a little girl/girl discovery gentlemen. I for one have no issues with it and believe me, it can add another wonderful dimension to your adult playtime.
    Summer is sure here in full bloom! Another day with cloudless skies, the temperature hitting 32 from now till the end of the weekend. Enjoy your day people.
  50. Child of the North in Canada from Canada writes: I'm told by someone in the know that you can tell when a woman really has an orgasm by the flush in her face (hard to fake).

    Orgasm is hard for many women to achieve, if the stats are right. It takes a great deal of trust on the woman's part and a great deal of patience on the man's part to get it right. Once you have the two parts working in harmony, so to speak, it is amazing how quickly a woman can climax.

    To J L from Toronto: what a woman fantasizes about while trying to achieve orgasm is really nobodies business but her own. If making it with a woman gets her motor humming, who cares. It doesn't mean she will rush out and have a lesbian relationship.

    To Michael Sharp: keep dreaming.

    To Pants 7 from Japan: If, 'who cares', is your attitude, I can't imagine your partners are having a great time in bed.
  51. J L from Toronto, Canada writes: Sawchuck 30 from Far Away From the GTA, Canada writes...

    'You're kidding, right? Right? You do know that most surveys of men's sexual fantasies shows chick-on-chick action as the most common one?

    You clearly have very little experience with women if you think a woman in tune with her own sexuality is to be avoided.

    You have my sympathies. '

    Sawchuck 30... I didn't say I wouldn't have sex with them - I just wouldn't marry them...
  52. City Pig from Toronto, Canada writes: Hey, do you know how to tell when a woman has an orgasim.....who cares.

    Just kidding.
  53. ki from Toronto from Canada writes: Robert Gibbons, interesting point of view. Agreed on many parts, however I'm dying to know, how long did your longest relationship last?
  54. B L from from LooLoo land, Canada writes: Moe, Moe Moe... You said: 'the younger generation is encouraging men to see them as sex objects, allowing themselves to be videoed, and they are loving it!'

    That's not it.... we're allowing men to see us a sexual beings .... bit of a difference, don't you think?
  55. carol c from Canada writes: 'I didn't say I wouldn't have sex with them - I just wouldn't marry them... '

    I find this attitude interesting, and I've heard a similar thing before - that men don't want to marry women who do what they consider to be dirty things. What's up with that? I'm curious.
  56. J L from Toronto, Canada writes: carol c writes.. I find this attitude interesting, and I've heard a similar thing before - that men don't want to marry women who do what they consider to be dirty things. What's up with that? I'm curious.'

    It's not that men don't want their wives to do 'dirty' things - they absolutely do. But for me there's a limit - being bi-sexual is just one my 'cut-offs' - a deal breaker.
  57. carol c from Canada writes: I'm curious about the limit I guess. It seems different for everyone. Some men would have a one night stand with a woman who would do things they wouldn't want their wife to do, that type of thing. I'm just curious about how a physical act becomes impregnanted with some sort of dirty girls do this, good girls don't. It's like the sexual version of the Betty vs. Veronica debate. I guess I think the opposite way, that some things are left for when I'm in a relationship and can really trust the person I'm with. Otherwise it's not going to happen.
  58. Gogh Forit from Canada writes: I misread the headline. I thought it said that women want better sax and here I am ready to pull out my horn for any gal who wants to play with the instrument.
  59. Moe Unting from Calgary, Canada writes: B.L.:

    You are likely right, but I maintain that part of the thrill of being a sexual being is in being pursued as a sex object, to know that your body ignites forces beyond ones control especially in others, and of course its safe if its merely anonymous digital images, lacking the agonistic rituals of mating.
  60. Edward Eh from Bathurst, NB, Canada writes: To J L from Toronto, it may not take much insensitivity from her male 'wham, bam, thank you mam' partner to fantasize that another woman may be a whole lot better as a sex partner, but show her that you know more about PLEASING a woman than another woman does (a function of self education, observation and Listening) and your woman will prove to you that fantasizing about having sex with a 'sister' does not make her a lesbian. Open minded? Yes... Yahoo!
    To J Lee from Canada, There are men like me who would be quite happy with sex even if we could no longer 'climax'... It's all about the intimacy, the vulnerability, the trust, and taking HER to heights she never dreamed of; ie. the Love.
  61. Carl White from Canada writes: If the tabloids have any truth in them, all women need is a 'G-shot'. Any testimonies to the truth of that?
  62. Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: Carl, I just had a fun summer read...a murder mystery with some sex in it...imagine...and I was talking to the 'girls' at work about the description of sex in the book. We were all laughing about the trembling, explosive, out of control hooey the writer was writing about. Yes, when we are with someone we love sex can be mind-blowing but to read any sort of crap suggesting 'g-shots' etc, really is stupid.

    As some have mentioned above and I will concur for myself...it is all about intimacy and, with that intimacy, the trust to go beyond your own boundaries and experiment. I am not sure that is going to happen with anyone except a long-term, trusted, intimate partner, are you?
  63. Able Bodied Man from It's NOT 'VICTORIA' Island, Canada writes:
    I dunno. A lot of women tell me they don't like sex. But that's never stopped them from crawling all over me and ripping my shirt off and pulling off my trousers.
  64. ki from Toronto from Canada writes: 'There are men like me who would be quite happy with sex even if we could no longer 'climax'...'

    ***

    Edward, I like what you had to say about love and intimacy but you know the above cannot be the truth... and that is from a female perspective. Gogh Forit, thanks for making me laugh!
  65. City Pig from Toronto, Canada writes: I am sure I've heard that the biggest part of sex for women was mental. It's a bit confusing. There is the whole intimacy and trust thing, but I think the younger women are perhaps a little more open with their desires and needs and perhaps therefore not necessarily in need of the trust & intimacy.

    But what do I know, I'm in my late 40's and still trying to figure women out, I will say this though it can be a lot of fun in not a little confusing sometimes.
  66. Carl White from Canada writes: 'Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: ... read any sort of crap suggesting 'g-shots' etc, really is stupid.'

    In the absence of any real data so far, I'd hold off on calling it stupid.
  67. Able Bodied Man from It's NOT 'VICTORIA' Island, Canada writes:
    You know, the problem is women can never make up their minds about sex. First its 'in,' then it's 'out,' then it's 'in' then it's 'out.' Make up your mind. Puhleeease!! Back and forth. Up and down. In and out. I'm on top, you're on top. Upside down and backwards. What DO you WANT? It gets a bit tiring doing these little drills and contortions over and over again, you know.

    Then at the end what happens? A short ittle ' o' ' and it's all over for another month.
  68. B L from from LooLoo land, Canada writes: Moe: Point taken - I guess I'd rather have my own sex object, rather than being one. Good thing my hubby likes a little 'discipline,' once in a while. ^wink^
  69. Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: City Pig, I found when I entered my 40's I became much freer in my sexual choices. I am more comfortable with myself and my sexuality and I know my limits (which are sky high). Younger women may seem more sexually savvy but I am not sure they really are. I think, perhaps, they just 'look' the part...
  70. Able Bodied Man from It's NOT 'VICTORIA' Island, Canada writes: 'How are they going to know that we're not getting off if we don't tell them?' asks the author of Sex Lives of Australian Women, published this month.
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Australian? Hmmmm...... that sheds a different light on the subject. The ladies might want to try saying 'baa-a-a-a-a-a.'
  71. Able Bodied Man from It's NOT 'VICTORIA' Island, Canada writes: Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: City Pig, I found when I entered my 40's I became much freer in my sexual choices. I am more comfortable with myself and my sexuality and I know my limits (which are sky high). Younger women may seem more sexually savvy but I am not sure they really are. I think, perhaps, they just 'look' the part...
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Jennifer... what do you do for a living?
  72. Edward Eh from Bathurst, NB, Canada writes: Hay Ki,
    I'm glad I could make you laugh, but please reconsider. My libido ain't what it used to be years ago, and if it tanks completely, the woman who has owned my heart for 45 years and counting can count on me to 'go for it'. Don't be so cynical, it IS all about her, and for her it's all about me. God Bless.
  73. Charlotte Creamer from Halifax, Canada writes: Right on, Robert Gibbons! The pendulum has swung too far -- women have taken on male traits, and men female traits. 'Feminine wiles' used to mean capriciousness, and men wanted to please women because they felt protective towards them, in much the same way as they did children. It was about indulging the weaker sex, a form of gallantry. And women learned to use it to their advantage. But it was something that was offered by the men, not demanded by the women. Now, it's the 'She Who Must Be Obeyed' syndrome, where most woman have turned into, as you say, control freaks, and men are simpering wimps or (worse) silently seething. No wonder marriages fall apart, and few couples, married or not, stay together very long. And no wonder sex is problematic, what with the man and the woman both fighting to be the one on top or the one on the bottom. Never mind role-reversal; we've got major role confusion these days.
  74. City Pig from Toronto, Canada writes: Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: City Pig, I found when I entered my 40's I became much freer in my sexual choices. I am more comfortable with myself and my sexuality and I know my limits (which are sky high). Younger women may seem more sexually savvy but I am not sure they really are. I think, perhaps, they just 'look' the part...
    ___________________________________________________________

    I don't know if I'm saying that younger women are more savvy, and I am only speculating based on what seems to be going on. But I get the impression they are a little more free and easy (not a slur) then when I was younger. I get the impression they are williing to express themselves without the intimacy or trust. And yeah, I know there have always been women like that but that's not what I am talking about now.

    I will say too that I like the maturity of older women, I dated a woman who was in her late 20's a few years back, and she was stunning but I just found I had nothing in commen with her. Women in their 40's are much more plugged in. I still don't have them figured out, but am always willing to learn.
  75. Arn N from Kitchener, Canada writes: One thing I've noticed -- when women want it, they REALLY, REALLY WANT it!!! There ain't nothing stoppen them! I've always been amazed by womens' voracious sexual appetite. They never overtly show it, but just under the surface it's there.

    As an aside -- Jennifer Rollison, you use the word 'Neandrethal' to describe men in a derogative way -- but surely you realize there were female neadrethals too, right?

    (Let's not even mention the fact that Neandrethals were a seperate species from Homo Sapians all together. 'Cro-Magnon' would be a more accurate insult!)
  76. From the North East from ottawa, Canada writes: Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: Carl, I just had a fun summer read...a murder mystery with some sex in it...imagine...and I was talking to the 'girls' at work about the description of sex in the book. We were all laughing about the trembling, explosive, out of control hooey the writer was writing about. Yes, when we are with someone we love sex can be mind-blowing but to read any sort of crap suggesting 'g-shots' etc, really is stupid. As some have mentioned above and I will concur for myself...it is all about intimacy and, with that intimacy, the trust to go beyond your own boundaries and experiment. I am not sure that is going to happen with anyone except a long-term, trusted, intimate partner, are you? *********************************************************** Umm, I want to make sure that response does not diminish what you say. However, there is something to be said about the intensity of a sexual experience and an orgasm. Sexual compatability and satisfaction does not necessarily depend on the length of time you are with someone. In fact, these two factors can run counter to one another. That being said, I fully agree with you that trust and intimacy are the keys to sexual fufillment, and should I add create the environment necessary to let go (a fundamental component in achieving a g-spot orgasm which can be quite a dramatic/ intense enperience for women not used to, or with difficulty experiencing one). Do not diminish the power of having sexually liberating experiences. They do not always happen within the bounds of a long term relationship, but often occur between people who have a great deal of trust in one another. Personally, in my experience I have found that having such experiences has often created a sense of attachment on the part of one of the participants, and so have chosen to focus on the person with whom I share something beyond sexual compatability.
  77. Straight Dave from Waterloooooo, Canada writes: Arn N from Kitchener, Canada writes: One thing I've noticed -- when women want it, they REALLY, REALLY WANT it!!! There ain't nothing stoppen them! I've always been amazed by womens' voracious sexual appetite. They never overtly show it, but just under the surface it's there.

    Hey Arn - when did you 'Neandrethals' learn to write? And, you're kidding right? Neandrethals? ain't nothing stoppen them? Use the dictionary much?
  78. Able Bodied Man from It's NOT 'VICTORIA' Island, Canada writes:
    'What women want: 'Better sex' '

    What men want: 'Better women'
  79. Max Axe from Toronto, Canada writes: I will give it to them then, no problem. Does anyone care what men want?

    Two women at once, like Samatha Fox.
    Women that swallow
    and women who never say no to anything we want.

    that's about it.
  80. Yourname 2 from Canada writes: Poor Bruce Willis from the Sixth Sense.
    Bruce Willis from Die Hard gets all the girls!
  81. Martin Fedgrass from Canada writes: They may want better sex, but women always insist on 'conditional' sex. Sex always comes with a price
  82. Levitt2 Beaver from Golden Lake ON, Canada writes: Robin Williams? Come on man, who the heck would want that hairy, ugly fat dude crawling all over you....man.......
  83. Steve Not an Alberta Redneck from Calgary, Canada writes: Quote from Aussie woman: 'I much prefer American men. Your average Aussie male is your basic animal.'

    Where does this 'research' apply to? Fort McMurray and points north?
  84. Max Axe from Toronto, Canada writes: I meant Megan Fox on the three way.
  85. Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: Able, why do you want to know my profession?

    As for you, Martin, women I know do not 'always insist on 'conditional' sex'. Perhaps it is you who are the problem and not the women you are with...In my lexicon I do not even understand 'conditional' sex...what does it mean? You are either into 'it' with your partner or you are not...maybe that is the fundamental problem, no?

    Max, keep looking, we are out there...
  86. Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: North East, I agree, I had one of those experiences a few years ago and it was GREAT. However, he broke the trust and, when he came back a few months ago, I found I cannot trust him now. I think about 'it' but the same intensity just isn't there...aside from the fact I have a wonderful man in my life (doesn't mean I don't think about 'it' with someone else)...adding to this, my man is not as 'wild' but with a little egging on he is getting there. Trust is not the issue, meat and potato sex is...luckily he has trust in me and is willing to experiment...
  87. Arn N from Kitchener, Canada writes: Straight Dave from Waterloooooo -- You know there are only 2 oo's at the end of Waterloo, right? Maybe I should use your dictionary.
  88. Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: City Pig, in one of my jobs I used to see a lot of men over 40...they had the same lament as you...yes they were seeing a woman under 30 but they couldn't make head nor tail of what she was saying, the music she was listening to or what she wanted. I always laughed and said...that's what happens when you date someone who could be your daughter...of course it's gonna be that way...it's called a generation gap...

    Arn, Cro-magnon and Neanderthals were here at the same time...there is evidence they may have 'mated' with one another. However, these has been no evidence of progeny from those matings...I am referring more to the knuckle-dragging, hairy, thick browed look and the 'assumptions' that go with it...tee hee hee...
  89. Steve Not an Alberta Redneck from Calgary, Canada writes: '1 in 3

    Women who rarely or never experience orgasm.'

    Give them the link to the Viagra article.
  90. Child of the North in Canada from Canada writes: I think Jennifer Rollison is right about older women being more confident in themselves and that a lot of what younger women present is a facade.

    Poor Max Axe. You sound like a blowhard. I don't think you really know what a woman wants at all. Remember the stat on how many women fake it? If you are 'nailing' a lot of different women, the chances you are satisfying one is remote.
  91. Harbinger from Out West from Canada writes: A couple sitting in bed. She says to him, 'Multiple? That wasn't even fractional'.
  92. Dennis sinneD from Calgary, Canada writes:

    Interesting comments here... it's obvious there is a wide array of sexual appetites, likes and dislikes... plus many differing experiences.

    It's not all lies...

    Just because you've never had 'that' experience, doesn't mean someone else hasn't.

    Just because you feel one way, doesn't mean everyone else does.

    Just because a person you have a sexual experience with is one way, doesn't mean they will be that way with everyone else.

    And Arn N, I agree with your comment. One thing I learned early on is (thankfully) many women are just as interested in sex as men... easily.
  93. Belle Kurve from Canada writes: Is it true in Australia - the women like it down under?
  94. Anger Equals Danger from Canada writes: Levitt2 Beaver from Golden Lake ON, Canada writes: Robin Williams? Come on man, who the heck would want that hairy, ugly fat dude crawling all over you....man.......

    = = = = = = =
    Robbie Williams, not Robin Williams . . .big difference

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robbie_Williams
    or
    http://www.myspace.com/robbiewilliamsofficial
  95. Brad Pitt from LA, United States writes: Hey Max Axe and Levitt2 Beaver - glad to see you migrated over from the pothead forum - hopefully Rusty did follow - he's a little up tight.
    As for Angelina, I can tell you my wife knows what she wants in bed - as for Megan Fox - sure tell her to give me a call.
  96. gordon foster from Canada writes: John Doucette from manotick, Canada writes: As to the researchers statement that North American data would be similar. Ibelieve it would be inverted.

    Subtle. :-)
  97. Hugh Jass from Canada writes:
    women want bad guys..

    http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19826614.100-bad-guys-really-do-get-the-most-girls.html?DCMP=ILC-hmts&nsref=news4headmg19826614.100

    Well... at least according to this other study.
  98. Reader Interested from toronto, Canada writes: An article about how Australian women feel/think about sex and it is predominately commented on by men.
    Somehow I'm oddly reassured by that........thanks guys, regardless of some of your inane comments it's encouraging to think you at least have an interest.
  99. Straight Dave from Waterlooooooooooooooo, Canada writes: Arn N - yur one smert Neandrethal!
  100. Wandering Willy from Kelowna, Canada writes: Ah my wife's birthday tomorrow. I took the extended her/my family out for a nice Lobster dinner. Our kids are getting her a bunch of herbs for the new garden (just bought a new place) and body cream stuff. I gave her a number ($ amount) and am dropping her off at a local high end 'adult' store where she can shop for things she wants. (While I was working in Kelowna before the family arrived, I sent her packages from the same store - she loved them and they looked fabulous on the web cam)

    While she likes all three things.....guess what she was most excited about getting? Can't wait!
  101. Mr. Justice from Anytown, Canada writes: This week's Gender Victim Article is a big disappointment.
  102. Jennifer Rollison from Canada writes: Why, Justice, because it's not about how awful women really are? How disappointing for you...
  103. Hopeful Romantic from Edmonton, Canada writes: No slagging of women here - but sure would like to find where the unattached friends of Jennifer R. (40-50 year old, comfortable with their sexuality, looking for companionship AND capable of carrying on an intelligent conversation) hide out!!!! One might think the species to be extinct!
  104. agesixracer _ from Canada writes: wow, internet surveys are reliable sources of information for books? how can she weed out the false applications just by reading them? i hardly find this to be reliable.
  105. J L from Toronto, Canada writes: Hey Jennifer Rollison, FYI - if you are a girl and you do a girl you are bi.

    And if you could read you would see that I am all for bi girls, but I just wouldn't consider one for anything more than a roll in the hay with her friend...
    • Posted 24/07/08 at 5:36 PM EDT |