Why we forget goals
"Human beings are, to put it gently, in a unique position in the animal world," writes Gary Marcus, author of Kluge: The Haphazard Construction of the Human Mind. "We're the only species smart enough to plan systematically for the future - yet we remain dumb enough to ditch even our most carefully made plans in favour of short-term gratification. ... The problem is that evolution failed to realize that remembering goals is not like recognizing objects. When your brain sees a lion, the thing to do is to decide, lickety-split, to get out of the way. Run first; ask questions later. We're programmed for just that kind of split-second decision ... We're not programmed to remember precise episodes from the past. Why not? Because remembering the exact date on which you last saw a lion is not particularly helpful when you're trying to get out of the way."
Source: Los Angeles Times
Forgetting to be patient
"Pick your poison: consumerism, materialism, self-absorption. Experts say they are each an ingredient in a recipe for perpetual impatience, turning humans into hamsters racing in their wheels, getting nowhere fast," Sandi Dolbee writes in The San Diego Union-Tribune. "Elizabeth Carll, a clinical psychologist in Long Island, N.Y., whose specialties include stress and health ... argues that [impatience is] also not good for society. 'I think patience really is the foundation for society in many areas of life.' she says. The world's religions preach the value of patience. In Christianity, it's one of the fruits of the spirit. In Judaism, it's part of wisdom. In Buddhism, it's an avenue on the journey to enlightenment. And so on. Carll, asked to explain why it can be so universally regarded as important and so universally ignored, answers this way: 'It's human nature.' "
Patience is good
"If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow."
- Chinese proverb
"To lose patience is to lose the battle."
- Mahatma Gandhi
"It is strange that the years teach us patience; that the shorter our time, the greater our capacity for waiting."
- British novelist Elizabeth Taylor (1912-75)
Oh, not always
"There ... is a limit at which forbearance ceases to be a virtue."
- Edmund Burke
"Patient, adj. Lacking sufficient fortitude to demand satisfaction."
- Victor Cahn
"A Temper to bear much, will have much to bear."
- Benjamin Franklin
Remember conversation?
"[I]s it possible that in becoming so accustomed to modern conveniences we are losing our patience as a culture?" writes Rachel Bryant, a psychologist. "How this has hit adolescents over the last decade is frightening. It used to be that you had a group of friends on whom you could count. You talked on the phone to one person at a time, which limited the number of people with whom you could connect in any given evening. ... Individual relationships with real friends had the chance to deepen. Things like trust, interest, listening, sensitivity to pauses in conversations, and laughter, characterized much of this time. Gossip existed, of course, but it was done in the privacy of a conversation, not screamed viciously over the Internet for 100 people to read."
Source: Elmira (N.Y.) Star-Gazette
Teaching kids patience
Some expert tips on how to teach greater patience to children:
Model appropriate patience. You, the parent, are your children's No. 1 role model.
Reward patience. Say something positive like, "Thank you for being so patient. I appreciate it."
Don't reward impatience.
Avoid overloading your children's schedules. Encourage them to have downtime.
Engage them in slow-paced and enriching activities such as enjoying nature. Teach them to appreciate its beauty and complexity. Gardening, constructing something that takes a few days to build, even card games can encourage children to be more thoughtful and deliberate.
Source: The (Fort Myers, Fla.) News-Press
Lose your impatience
In 2005, Carol Krucoff described several strategies for putting
time back on your side. They
included:
Wake up right. "Set your alarm clock early, but don't get up when it rings," suggested Paul Pearsall, author of The Last Self-Help Book You'll Ever Need. "Lie there a few minutes and practise the savouring response: Think about who and what is worth getting up for and the privilege of being awake in such a rushed yet wonderful world."
Take off your watch. "People hurry up when they see a clock, which is why stores don't have clocks - they want us to linger," says Carl Honoré, author of In Praise of Slowness. Test this technique by going "watch-free" on evenings and weekends.
Listen to relaxing music. "Your body synchronizes to the rhythms around you," says
psychologistSharon Heller,
author of Too Loud, Too Bright, Too Fast, Too Tight. Look for music that's paced to a relaxed heartbeat, about 60 beats per minute.
Source: Natural Health magazine
Thought du jour
"It's a great life if you don't
weaken."
- John Buchan (1875-1940), popular author and governor-general
