"I found it hard, it was hard to find, oh well, whatever, never mind." Er, no. Never minding, as it turns out, was not an option.
Nevermind, the album by Nirvana, was released 20 years ago. We remember the cover art – a clearly circumcised baby boy, swimming in pursuit of a dollar bill dangled in front of him – but what about the blurry photo inside? It is an unwashed Kurt Cobain, middle finger in focus, with bandmates Dave Grohl (now a rock star) and bassist Krist Novoselic (politically active in Washington state) on his flanks. Nevermind was a masterpiece of dissent – a belligerent-but-melodic, flannel-flaunting, culture-shifting, genre-defining bleep you to the music industry's fashion of the time, which was glam rock and poofy hair.
The response from MTV and the record biz? Thank you, Nirvana, slap us any time you wish. What's the scent you're wearing, by the way? Teen spirit? Very catchy, love the whiff.
The band's label is still sending Christmas cards to the band, long after Nirvana's abrupt dissolution following Cobain's suicide in 1994. In September, Universal Music rolls out a deluxe edition of Nevermind, complete with a concert DVD and extra CDs of rarities and alternative mixes. Cobain, a punk, isn't rolling over in his grave in reaction to the commerce.
He already rolled restlessly in life, keenly aware of the score as it happened: Nirvana (and fellow Seattle grunge acts) were soon serving the servants. "Teenage angst has paid off well," Cobain sang on the opening of Nirvana's follow-up album In Utero, "Now I'm bored and old."
Of course, Cobain, tormented, never grew old. He killed himself with a shotgun, joining a so-called 27 Club that two weeks ago instantly granted membership to another dead music star, Amy Winehouse, who, like Jimi Hendrix, Jim Morrison and Janis Joplin, lived only 27 years.
It's no legacy, their death-certificate fine print. Let his resting age be a footnote in the Cobain file, for his chief impact was Nevermind, "the album that changed everything," as Spin magazine asserts in its current issue. (A covers collection, Spin Presents Newermind : A Tribute Album, is available for download at spin.com.)
Nevermind's influence was heavy. It was a galvanizing record, something for everyone – dug by freaks and fratboys, jocks and mopes, boys and girls. It had punk ( Breed), drastic dynamics ( Drain You), a sensitive-creepy rape ballad ( Polly) and one colossal anthem ( Smells Like Teen Spirit). Songs were pissed-off and loud, but with hooks and billboard-sized riffs.
Post- Nevermind, Seattle became the scene that mattered, with locals Pearl Jam and Soundgarden exploding soon after. MTV invested heavily in alt-rock, giving the network a new level of credibility and attracting new viewers.
Empowered by Cobain's slack enunciation, mumbling singers suddenly were in demand. A video-parody of Teen Spirit gave Weird Al Yankovic one of his many career spurts.
Nirvana and Cobain were uncombed misfits who attracted the same: "I'm so ugly, that's okay cause so are you." The losers were winning.
Before Nevermind was released, Cobain had an inkling that Nirvana was on the verge, perhaps reaching Pixies status. Former manager Danny Goldberg thought Jane's Addiction level was attainable. Then a teen-angst anthem hit the radio, and grunge rock exploded – real rock, dark rock, not the glittery hair-band variation.
"My partner told me that a friend of his had been at a Guns N' Roses show in New York when Smells Like Teen Spirit was played over the PA, and the huge macho crowd cheered," Goldberg recalls in Spin. "That was when we realized that [ Nevermind] was going to be bigger than anything that anyone involved had dreamed of."
Nevermind was released on Sept. 24, 1991, debuting at No. 144 on the Billboard album chart. It reached No. 1 in January, 1992, jumping over Michael Jackson's Dangerous. It has sold more than 30 million copies worldwide, according to Billboard. It received two Grammy nominations – best alternative performance and best rock song (for Teen Spirit) – but won no trophies.
Rolling Stone ranked Nevermind 17th among its list of 500 top albums.
Tragically, the record had a disturbing effect on its author: Cobain struggled with the fame his art had brought him. "Self-appointed judges judge," he sang on In Utero's Serve the Servants, "more than they have sold." It was reference to the pressure of meeting the standards set by people – record labels? media? fans? – other than himself.
He's gone, but like Winehouse, Johnny Cash, Morrison and other troubled performers, his music reflected the madness of what it means to be a human being. Twenty years after its birth, Nevermind is still paid attention.
Brad Wheeler