Are you a man whose wife/partner/special lady friend is with child? And do you find yourself telling people "We're pregnant" or "We're expecting a baby?" If so, Mila Kunis has something she'd like to tell you: Shut up!
The actress, who is expecting a child with fiancé Ashton Kutcher, went on a rant on the topic during an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live Tuesday night.
The host told Kunis, "My wife and I are pregnant. We are having a baby very soon as well."
That set Kunis off, albeit in a way that seemed scripted and meant for laughs.
"Oh, you both are having a baby? You and your wife are pregnant?" she pointedly asked.
She then stormed off and took hold of a microphone to address the audience.
"Hello, I'm Mila Kunis, with a very special message for all you soon-to-be fathers," she said. "Stop saying, 'We're pregnant.' You're not pregnant! Do you have to squeeze a watermelon-sized person out of your lady-hole? No. Are you crying alone in your car listening to a stupid Bette Midler song? No. When you wake up and throw up, is it because you're nurturing a human life? No. It's because you had too many shots of tequila. Do you know how many shots of tequila we had? None. Because we can't have shots of tequila. We can't have anything because we've got your little love goblin growing inside of us. All you did was roll over and fall asleep."
But hatred of the phrase boggles some people. Blogger Lindsay Cross wrote about being taken aback by the vitriol in 2012.
"Honestly, I had never considered that anyone would have a problem with a man and woman sharing the title of pregnancy, even if only one of them was carrying the little one around all day. I assumed that two people are going to be parents, which means that two people are expecting a baby, two people are pregnant," she wrote in a post on Mommyish.
But after seeing a comment on blog called STFU, Parents, which covers all the annoying things parents do, Cross said her "naivety was shattered."
She went on to recount people's reactions to hearing people say "We're pregnant."
"When I hear 'we're pregnant!', I automatically assume you are assholes," one person said.
A woman who is pregnant seemed ready to do battle over pronoun choice. "If my darling husband dared to use the phrase 'we' are pregnant, there would be trouble. 'We' are not suffering from edema. 'We' are not getting stretch marks. 'We' are not dealing with rib kicks and bladder punches. And 'we' sure as hell are not going through childbirth. It's also such a lovey-dovey dithery limp phrase to me."
So watch what you say, otherwise you are going to be in trouble – you, not we.