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"Canadian women make do with mediocre sex lives" is the disheartening conclusion of a new survey that quizzed 29,000 people in 36 countries about their intimate moments.

The highly unscientific tally (commissioned by Durex, a condom manufacturer) found that just 31 per cent of women surveyed in Canada were enjoying orgasms during sex, compared with 84 per cent of men.

Whatever happened to she comes first?

Still, just as a whopping 69 per cent of female respondents said they rarely or never climax during sex, 69 per cent also claimed they are sexually satisfied, which suggests some fakery is afoot, or at least some settling.

Conducted online, the "Durex Sexual Wellbeing Global Survey" asked adults over 18 about their health, education, beliefs, relationships and attitudes toward sex and social circumstances last fall.

More than 1,000 Canadians (both men and women) took the survey: 66 per cent claimed satisfaction in the bedroom; 78 per cent insisted their lovers were capable of delivering pleasure and 65 per cent said a good sex life made them a better wife, husband or partner, compared with just 45 per cent of Europeans. Some 20 per cent of Canadians hoped for sexual experiences with more than one person simultaneously, in line with the rest of the world. Seven per cent also wanted to give sexting a try, meaning the sad lessons of Anthony Weiner have brought little to bear.

Ultimately, only 10 per cent of adults around the world said they were "extremely satisfied" with the quality of nookie in their lives. As for the "elusive simultaneous orgasm," nearly half of Americans surveyed thought they were more likely to "catch a glimpse of Big Foot" than experience that particular pleasure, according to the Huffington Post.

On the bright side, the numbers revealed that Canadians are game to try harder in the sack than the international average. Some 49 per cent have talked to their partner, compared with 42 per cent globally. Canadians were more willing to experiment with sex toys and lubricant; some 15 per cent also hazarded role-playing games, compared with 11 per cent globally.

Cops and robbers, anyone?

What do you make of the findings?

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