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Individually, religion and sexuality are two topics that rarely fail to raise an emotional response from Canadians. The combination of the two takes the conversation to a new level, as the Canadian Conference of Bishops acknowledged recently when it noted the "confusion and anger … among many of the faithful" after the former bishop of Antigonish, N.S., pleaded guilty to importing child pornography. It was a reminder of a long and conflicted relationship that Faith Exchange panelists have convened to discuss.

Dr. Michael W. Higgins is a biographer, a CBC documentarist and currently the vice-president of Mission and Catholic identity at Sacred Heart University in Fairfield, Conn. He is the author or co-author of more than a dozen books, including Suffer the Children Unto Me: An Open Inquiry into the Clerical Abuse Scandal.

Vettivelu Nallainayagam is an associate professor of economics at Mount Royal University. He is Hindu, originally from Sri Lanka, and has been in Canada since 1984. He has served as president of the Calgary Multicultural Centre and the Ethno-Cultural Council of Calgary, and has arranged multifaith panels to talk about religion to students in the residences at Mount Royal.

Sheema Khan writes a monthly column for The Globe and Mail. She has a master's degree in physics and a Ph.D in chemical physics from Harvard. She is the author of Of Hockey and Hijab: Reflections of a Canadian Muslim Woman.

James Loewen is an active member of his Mennonite Brethren church and parent of four children. He advocates for restorative justice to federal government and in churches, is a past president of the Church Council on Justice and Corrections and has organized and facilitated dialogues across Canada and internationally.

Rabbi Howard Voss-Altman has been serving Temple B'nai Tikvah, Calgary's Reform Jewish congregation, for the past eight years. He is a community leader in the areas of human rights and civil liberties.

Lorna Dueck has been reporting on Christian practice in Canadian life for the past 20 years. She is an evangelical Christian and executive producer of Listen Up TV on Global TV, Sundays at 11 a.m. Eastern time.

Moderator Guy Nicholson edits The Globe and Mail's online Comment page. He professes no religious beliefs.

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Guy Nicholson: Thanks for taking the time to join us. Panelists, it's been nearly 50 years since sexual liberation in the West. How would you characterize the modern connection between faith and sexuality in this country?

Michael Higgins: In the context of Catholic teaching, I would think it safe to say that the connection is contorted, controverted and often confusing. There is a teaching on the body, on the role and meaning of sexuality, and on the liberating dimensions of a truly "enfleshed" existence that is healthy, scriptural, humanistic and deeply Catholic, but more often than not this runs counter to the experience and perception of most Catholics and non-Catholics alike. The relationship of faith to sexuality is seen primarily as antagonistic and fearful, a false and dangerous dualism that has been a constant in Christian thinking from the outset. This, in turn, contributes to a widening gap between spirituality and sexuality and in the worst-case scenario, being spiritual is opposed to being sexual. But we are "graced" sexual beings and our spirituality is neither foreign to nor in opposition to a healthy and integrated life of faith.

Howard Voss-Altman: Our movement - Reform Judaism - continues to wrestle with the tension between tradition and modernity. We recognize changing attitudes and customs, but continue to promote healthy, loving, monogamous sexual relationships between consenting adults. We do not distinguish between same-sex and heterosexual relationships, and believe that sexual intimacy is one of God's most profound and generous gifts to humanity.

Vettivelu Nallainayagam: According to Hindu doctrine, a human being has four objectives in this world: One is Kama, the pursuit of pleasure of different types, sexual pleasure being one of them. Sexual pleasure is neither glorified nor abhorred. It is considered as essential for procreation and for a satisfactory life. The other three are Artha (pursuit of wealth), Dharma (following the righteous path) and Moksh (seeking liberation). Hence, sexuality is an integral part of Hindu faith.

Sheema Khan: Believe it or not, sexuality is not a taboo issue in Islamic teachings. In fact, it is seen as part of one's spirituality. Asceticism is strongly discouraged, while intimacy is encouraged within the bounds of marriage (as traditionally defined). There are many authentic narrations of the Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) which stress spiritual reward for having sex, which encourage foreplay, and emphasize the mutual rights of husband and wife to a pleasurable experience. This is part of the intimacy, mercy, love and peace in a spousal relationship. Coercion is not permitted. As part of the faith, Muslims are required to take a ritual bath following sexual relations (and there is explicit discussion about what constitutes such relations). Furthermore, it is not out of the ordinary for the permissibility or prohibition of sexual techniques to be discussed forthrightly. Right now, there are two prominent Muslim women (one in Egypt, one in the Gulf) who have popular followings on television for their discussions about sexuality.

What is forbidden is sex outside of marriage, and flaunting sex in public.

James Loewen: What a challenging question. It seems to me that the spectrum of faith response to issues of sexuality have broadened significantly over the last decades. Some faith communities have the same values and expectations as their predecessors did, while others have found ways to incorporate new learning and expectations along a full range of sexual ideas and behaviours. I would say that a fairly broad shift has happened in that a discussion on the harms of "inappropriate sexuality" rather than just on their moral value has become more common.

Howard Voss-Altman: This seems to me a salient question, James. What do our faith traditions consider to be sexually inappropriate? While I cannot speak for our entire tradition, I believe that the Reform movement would object to sexual relationships that are exploitive, that fail to have an emotional component (hooking up), and that fail to have a requisite spiritual or emotional connection between two people. It is safe to say that in our movement, masturbation and homosexuality are simply non-issues.

Vettivelu Nallainayagam: Howard, Hindu religion believes marriage to be sacred, and hence sex before marriage or outside marriage is considered against the moral codes. Also, sex that involves exploitation is not acceptable.

Lorna Dueck: Guy, I would characterize the modern connection as complicated, because the sexuality described in my faith tradition feels like it is not normative in the cultural messages we get on this topic. Our ethic is that sexuality is to be enjoyed, a place of care and protection, a place of procreation, a place of comfort, decency, and natural expression.

Michael Higgins: The bigger issue seems to be about the "enjoying" bit, Lorna. Christians need to develop a "theology of pleasure" that is celebratory rather than punitive. A post-Augustinian ethic is a necessity.

Howard Voss-Altman: If God did not want us to enjoy our sexual relationships, we would not have been given such an extraordinary gift - the physical and emotional pleasures of sex. I believe that an absence of sexual pleasure is not only contrary to our human nature but also contrary to the divinity of God's creation.

Guy Nicholson: Do younger Canadian Christians really need a new theology, Michael? I have heard people in their 20s and 30s make what I've considered surprisingly clear distinctions between their active religious belief and their sexuality. They have simply discarded the parts they feel are no longer relevant.

Michael Higgins: This is the heart of the matter, Guy. You are quite right: Many, if not most, Catholics (and this is not limited to recent generations) divide their faith life from their sexual life in large measure because they find the teaching of the church incredible. Simply ignoring the teaching then becomes the primary option. But a meaningful life of faith eschews such compartmentalization and seeks genuine integrity. The need for a carefully reasoned anthropology that takes into account new models and paradigms of understanding can be a way forward. But there is a lot of fear!

Howard Voss-Altman: I could not agree more, Michael. But what is the underlying foundation of that fear?

Michael Higgins: I think the fear, Howard, comes with any departure from a traditionalist reading of the body, from the perception that sexual pleasure - ecstasy - sunders reason and self-control and damages our dignity as humans made in the image of God, and the lingering Puritanism that has us see sexuality as a conduit of evil rather than grace.

Howard Voss-Altman: Such perspectives are not only highly patriarchal - after all, women menstruate and give birth and it's all so mysterious to men - but also reflect the church's desire for behavioural control, especially in the bedroom. Generally, given our history, Jews are not looking for theological excuses to deny potential sources of pleasure. Judaism - within loving relationships - seeks to promote healthy sexuality as a source of pleasure. Sexual intimacy is one of humanity's great gifts. Why seek to deny it?

Michael Higgins: Two of the best books in the Catholic tradition written on sexuality, intimacy and faith were written by priests: one a French psychiatrist, Marc Oraison, and the other a Dutch psychologist, Henri Nouwen - and they do precisely what you say, and that is underscore the teaching that "sexual intimacy is one of humanity's great gifts." And they were celibates.

Lorna Dueck: I know you expect this from me, Howard, but a tone of unfettered pursuit of sexual intimacy among religious discussion is dangerous. For some people, sex is a trigger to hope - hope that new doors, new love, new futures are opening - and that's one reason why the abuse of sex among religious encounters is so damaging.

Howard Voss-Altman: I don't think we disagree at all, Lorna. I wasn't advocating for "unfettered pursuit of sexual intimacy." The true holiness of sexual intimacy can only be found within loving, non-exploitive, monogamous relationships. Religious sexual abuse is so disturbing because it transforms a relationship of trust and holiness into a relationship of depravity and exploitation. I hate to quibble, but what we are really talking about is the unhealthy reality of religious leaders who are celibate. Celibacy is, of course, a healthy choice for many priests who are able to serve God with discipline and nobility. But clearly, for many others, it is an unhealthy choice that has led to serious dysfunction and criminal behaviour.

Michael Higgins: Ron Rolheiser, the Canadian spiritual writer and academic, has rightly spoken of celibacy as a "wound," an absence, that makes other possibilities flourish. Celibacy is a charism of witness, not primarily a disciplinary measure.

Sheema Khan: I don't know whether younger Canadian Christians need a new theology. However, given the hypersexualization of our culture (television, movies, music, etc.), I wonder how young people handle the onslaught. Without a moral framework, how does one deal with the incessant pressure and expectations so prevalent in our society? Within Muslim tradition, "saving" oneself for marriage is honourable; remaining committed to one partner within marriage is also honourable. (Islam does recognizes that incompatibility may ensue, allowing for divorce.)

While a lot is made of Muslim women's dress, one finds in traditional Muslim culture, an expectation of both men and women to dress modestly in public, rather than flaunt what they've got. There is an expectation of respectability between the genders. Although, that may not always be the case in reality.

Vettivelu Nallainayagam: I agree that there seems to be an overkill in our society with sex being touted as the sole objective of human life. Our youngsters are inundated with messages constantly that glorify sex and are under tremendous pressure to conform. We need to educate them that our faiths have certain boundaries and that these boundaries have to be respected in the interests of a healthy society.

James Loewen: Guy - in the Mennonite tradition, faith is never irrelevant, regardless of the issue. I think theology is always changing and being renewed based on the world views and experiences of those who are interacting with scripture and tradition. Young people have consistently shown a willingness and ability to reinterpret their faith tradition in light of their environment and those ideas they feel are important. It seems to me that it would be important for the leaders and influencers of youth to be equipped to guide and inform their youth in this process, allowing for learning to occur in both directions. Sexuality contains the potential for great good and pleasure as well as great evil and pain. An active and engaged theology and church would allow our youth to maximize the first and minimize the last.

Lorna Dueck: When Christianity began to speak into the sexual ethic, somewhere around 60 A.D., it was in stark contrast to sexual norms of that day. It grew in an environment where behaviour was crazy by even our standards, something historian Rodney Stark points out so well in his research on how pre-Christian Rome urged its bachelors to get married simply so they could have more children. (Stark's theory is that Christians produced children faster because of their sexual norms and eclipsed the Empire) This tension of picking and choosing how to apply biblical teaching on sexuality has been wrestled with ever since, and I'd argue that no, we don't need new guidelines, but we sure need more support and education for those trying to understand why Christianity has so much to say about sex.

Michael Higgins: It is true that historically, the contribution of Christian thinking to the making of a sexual ethic that is relational, fecund and, in a profound way, holy, added immeasurably as a corrective to the Empire's less enlightened views. The "revolutionary" nature of the Christian ethic has to some degree been softened if not muted over the centuries. Time for a revival grounded in a theological anthropology that is in credible conversation with the human sciences and other faith traditions.

James Loewen: I wonder if the difficulty that Christians have in talking about sex is that so much of our early experiences of it are labelled as sinful and the predominant punitive mindset of many Christian traditions precludes open conversations. If we were able to move to a more grace-filled, restorative mindset around wrongdoing, the barriers to learning and to exploring what is good sexual behaviour or not would be reduced.

Howard Voss-Altman: Are we still wrestling with original sin? Is this the theological teaching holding us back? If we could only transcend the "forbidden fruit" mindset, perhaps religion could evolve into a much healthier sexual ethic.

Sheema Khan: Islamic teachings have no concept of "original sin" or "forbidden fruit." Eve is not seen as the source of Adam's downfall. Nor is menstruation seen as a punishment (nor the pangs of childbirth). There is no judgment associated with the natural course of a woman's cycle, or her pregnancy.

There are also many authentic narrations of Prophet Mohammed's (PBUH) life which are quite explicit about sexuality - since sexuality forms part and parcel of spirituality. There are even prayers prior to sexual intercourse, and as I said before, foreplay is encouraged (as part of religious teachings). Many Muslims are unaware of the forthrightness of Islamic teachings with regards to sexuality.

Howard Voss-Altman: Beautifully stated. And within Reform Judaism, we have very similar views. We are not coming from a place of judgment.

Guy Nicholson: Some of you have mentioned the teaching that marriage is the sole appropriate boundary for sex. This teaching - common in many religious faiths and interpretations, though of course not all - is one that I think, to borrow Michael's words, many Canadians would find "incredible." Even the boundary of "loving relationships," while much more flexible, seems a long way from exploitation.

Sheema Khan: Sexual intimacy is part of an overall emotional commitment made by two human beings. It is an incredibly powerful gift, which, according to Islamic teachings, is to be used in a manner deemed appropriate by the Creator, who provided these impulses in the first place, and knows our weaknesses and strengths. The same can be said about intelligence, power, etc. - gifts provided by a Creator.

Guy Nicholson: In my role as an online editor, I have read many reader comments citing sexual abuse as a factor in lapsed belief. For those reading who don't follow religion as closely as you do, panelists, how powerful has this issue been in your various faiths?

Howard Voss-Altman: I don't think it has impacted Jewish faith in any significant way. We have not - with a few exceptions - been plagued by clergy sex abuse, and so we tend to see this issue from a distance. If there is an issue, it is usually viewed as one of institutional distrust - organized religion is seen as a spiritual deterrent, and cannot be trusted.

Michael Higgins: The scandal attendant on discovering that religious leaders or people of faith have broken the law, violated the young and abused the innocent is acutely damaging. And such scandals are not unique to Catholicism. The overriding issue is how the authorities confront the problem, admit complicity when present, work to rebuild trust in a system that for many people mediates God's presence, and acknowledge contrition and justice in the making of amends.

I know of only too many cases of individuals who have walked away from their faith because of the unwillingness of the institution to acknowledge failure and seek forgiveness. And I should emphasize that in my experience, this has been more the case with Catholics who have not suffered abuse themselves rather than with those who have. I can't begin to understand what that means. Certainly, sex abuse of any variation and hue must be condemned with alacrity.

James Loewen: I think harm experienced at the hands of those entrusted with authority and power is a common reason to reject a faith institution. Again, I think primarily, it is our failure as churches to respond to harm with a restoring justice that has sundered meaningful and important relationships. If a person harmed by a leader was able to participate in a respectful and accountable process that had a healing outcome for them, it is much less likely that they would lose faith.

Sexual harm is one of the deeper ways to experience harm, and so it is no surprise that there are many examples within my faith tradition where the person harmed has left the church and even their faith. This is tragic, as it represents not just a failure in the person who caused the harm, but a failure of the church to hold them responsible in a relational way that includes and is empowering to the person they harmed. This broader failure is what perhaps requires the new thinking around orthodoxy and orthopraxy around how we respond to harm and how we learn to do relationships in more respectful and healing way. Our sexual behaviour would then be informed by these learnings.

Lorna Dueck: Sexual violation is an enormous factor in people losing faith with Christian communities. How can it be anything less - it's such a huge violation of hearts, hopes, faith ideals. Misuse of sexual power is a profoundly human problem. Up to 2 per cent of priests in the Catholic Church have been accused of sexual abuse. Protestant clergy is slightly higher, according to Pedophilia and Priests by John Jay and Philip Jenkins. That's on par with other institutions, although the figures from Sex in The Forbidden Zone, by Peter Rutter, are also disturbing. (Seven per cent of psychiatrists have admitted sexual contact with patients, 20 to 30 per cent of female students have been sexually approached by professors, etc.)

But when someone has been sexually abused by a person who claims to teach about Christ, well, I have seen people recover - the best example is the bestseller The Shack - but there is so very much lost in all areas.

Sheema Khan: There aren't too many statistics that I'm aware of about sexual abuse within the Muslim community. However, anecdotally, there are reports of sexual abuse within families. The reason why we don't hear more is the tremendous shame felt by the victims, when it should be the perpetrators who should feel ashamed. The current high-profile case (headed to the Supreme Court) of a niqabi woman in Ontario deals with allegations of sexual abuse by male relatives when she was a child. Since opening up about her experience in high school, she has gradually found solace and strength in her faith in God.

When crimes take place within the "authority" of the family (rather than any organized Muslim institution), there is a lapse in faith of patriarchal authority, and perhaps even the institution of marriage. Again, this is all anecdotal.

Lorna Dueck: Sexual violation has a good assuage through spirituality. Justice is needed, but it isn't adequate for the wound that has occurred. There has to be a reclaiming of self, identity, a purification to create again the wholeness that was stolen. The teachings of Jesus offer that - it's a process, but it is renewal of what was destroyed and a returning to life.

James Loewen: I think you make an important point here, Sheema. While it is true that there are those who lose faith as a result of the failure of the faith institution and its leaders to protect from sexual harm, there are also many who have found great healing and renewed life. Within the Mennonite tradition, healing and redemption have occurred as a result of prayer, direct interventions of God, support of grace-filled people, support groups and many other ways.

Guy Nicholson: This has been a good discussion, everyone. Thank you.

Lorna Dueck: Thank you, Guy.

Michael Higgins: Thanks, Guy.

Sheema Khan. Fascinating discussion. If I can add one more thing, it's the destructive attitude within some Muslim cultures about maintaining the "purity" of women. The most glaring example of this is "honour killing" (an oxymoron, if there ever was one), in which a woman, often young or unmarried, is killed if she is merely suspected of having sexual relations outside of marriage, or inviting sexual attention. The dynamics are complex, but the result is a terrible injustice, and unhealthy attitudes toward women.

There is a disturbing attitude running through some Muslim cultures, and imported to Canada, that the woman is somehow at fault if she is raped or sexually assaulted. A few years ago, an Australian imam caused a furor by saying as much. Thankfully, members of the local and international Muslim community spoke out against him. We need to have these discussions, and we cannot stand in silence in face of such unjust attitudes.

Howard Voss-Altman: What an important insight, Sheema. I hope we can have that conversation in the future. Thank you for your sensitive and eye-opening views. I really appreciate them. And thank you all as always for the discussion. I feel as if we have just scratched the surface. Perhaps we can revisit the topic another day.

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