I almost bought a car again last week. It's becoming a bad habit – almost buying cars I really don't need. Is it an addiction? Not at all. I could quit any time. Honest. Do I have commitment issues? Maybe.
It was a vision in black-on-black leather; a needy 400-horsepower sedan with a few issues. The distance killed us really, it was on the other side of the country. Plus, I prefer caramel leather. This one slipped through my fingers, but there will be others. There are always others.
Classic cars – as well as not-quite-classics – are an expensive and inevitably heartbreaking habit. Nothing lasts forever, especially here in the Land of Rust. All cars eventually break beyond any reasonable repair, or sometimes your infatuation with them simply fades. There's always a next one, just one more to add to your collection, one more you have to own. The quest for the perfect car is foolish and never-ending.
Cars are like any shopping habit – shoes, ultra-light bicycles, Star Wars trinkets or camera equipment – except you can't store them in your front hallway, and they can be painfully expensive.
There was a well-used 1993 Acura NSX a few years back, an early model with the pop-up headlights. It was still riding high on the factory suspension setup. A classic in the making: $35,000 was a lot of money, but when it's for something you know will be worth around $100,000 in the near future, it starts to make an awful lot of sense. Look at that, a low-mileage NSX sold for $80,000 (U.S.) earlier this month. Urgh.
Talk to any gearhead, and they'll have a story like this. The "I should've bought it then …" lament.
The Internet has facilitated massive advancements in human time-wasting and niche hobby indulgence. Did you know there are entire sub-Reddits, online message boards, devoted to plumbing the depths of YouTube to dredge up all the bad video gunk? There's also a message board about "weird eggs" and one where everyone writes stories about the same fictional character named Norman. The latter, by the way, has more than 57,000 readers.
For cars, addicts can look to classified ads on sites like AutoTrader or Kijiji, of course. But often the really weird stuff is hidden deeper inside the Internet. There's Bring a Trailer, which started out as a blog for people who want to waste time looking at unusual cars for sale, and has now become a fully-fledged auction site. There are all the model and brand-specific message boards, which often include a For Sale section. And then there's the Europe-wide used car site Autoscout24 and the Japanese Goo-Net-Exchange. Although, with the Canadian dollar trading on par with matzoh meal, shopping for a car outside the country is out of the question.
Hold that thought: 8 minutes and 30 seconds left on an auction for a 1978 teal-coloured Saab 99 GL. Its odometer stopped working. There's a long list of leaks, rattles and minor problems. It looks good though and is relatively rust free. Bidding's only at $2,000 (U.S.) and could you imagine cruising around in that teal coupe on a sunny summer day? Bliss, $2,200 with two minutes left. Thirty seconds. Sold! Oh, nevermind, it didn't meet the reserve price.
There were 59 reader comments on this weekday auction at Bring a Trailer. One reader, Fez, wrote, "Whoa … reserve not met. This, like all Saabs, was literally a mixed bag of looks and issues. I put a fair amount of time into considering this. ..." The hyper-nerdy discussions that go with each car are almost as interesting as the cars themselves. Think Munk debate meets Popular Mechanics.
There's something deeply satisfying about getting a bargain. The trick is being able to spot something that's hit the bottom of its depreciation curve, and might some day head back up the other side.
Once I had my finger hovering over the "Place Bid" button on a red Lancia Montecarlo that'd been modified to look like a Group 4 rally car: double-bubble roof and gold period-correct alloy wheels. It would've been trouble. A mid-engined Italian sports car for Camry money. I'm not saying it would've been smart, but it would've been fun.
If I won the lottery, I wouldn't write a million-dollar cheque for the carbon-fibre hypercar de jour. Instead, I'd buy a big garage somewhere and fill it with dozens of un-classic cars, all leaking oil and inevitably in need of minor repair. I'd drive a different one every day. That would be heaven.
Oh look, a solid Porsche 944 S2. Be right back.
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