If you think the Rural Alberta Advantage has to do with barley-yield ratios, then you didn't get the memo: They're one of the many insanely awesome homegrown bands - Constantines, Great Lake Swimmers, Yukon Blond, Hot Panda, Our Lady Peace - that are all part of a killer line up for Canadian Music Fest 2010. (Various venues; canadianmusicfest.com)
2. Pot o' gold
Not that anyone ever needed a reason to hoist a pint (or five) and plow through a plate of Shepherd's Pie followed, hours later, by haddock and chips, but this event is sanctioned by the city, all in honour of the man who brought enlightenment to the Emerald Isle. It's called the St. Patrick's Day Parade, and if you think those visions of Hazel McCallion are the Guinness talking, they're not - she's the grand marshal. (Tomorrow, noon. Starts at Bloor and St. George. Free)
3. Raw deals
If you're in the mood to stock up on whole food supplements, Dead Sea medicinal herbs, natural buckwheat pillows, cellphone anti-radiation shields, soap nuts, bio-energy products, or quantum pendants, then the Total Health Show is for you. This year's lectures include "Inner Mysticism," "The Thyroid: The True Master Gland Behind Immortality" and "Healing Yourself with Living Raw Food."(Today and tomorrow, 10 a.m.-9 p.m. Metro Toronto Convention Centre, 255 Front St. W. $10)
4. Gentlemen, start your engines
Sometimes you just want to put the raw-milk cheese back in the fridge, turn down the Rachmaninoff and listen to the sound of engines revving as you take in the spectacle of rural thrill-seekers sailing through the air on two wheels. That time is now, as the Monster Energy Supercross flies into town for the only international destination on the AMA circuit. (Today. Rogers Centre, 1 Blue Jays Way. Doors open at 12:30 p.m.; main event, 7 p.m. From $15)
5. Bow to the wow
If you're a purebred dog enthusiast, you already know about the Purina National 2010 dog show. If you think those people are nuts, this is your chance to judge them all at the same time. For everyone else, the Best Puppy in Show segment is worth the price of admission. (Today and tomorrow, starting at 8 a.m. International Centre, 6900 Airport Rd. Adults, $10; children, $6.)