Dear Mr. Smith: Do you think it's polite to ask guests to remove their shoes when they enter your house?
I have been dreading this question, as my views on this are most unpopular. This is an issue that is going to inflame and enrage. I even debated avoiding it, in order to forestall the deluge of indignation that is going to fall on me.
Canadians are strangely passionate about this issue. A very large portion of the population, probably the majority, believes (and with something resembling fury) that to enter an abode without removing your shoes would be the height of boorishness. They believe that this simple act of politeness should occur regardless of the weather, the quality of your footwear or the formality of the occasion. That means that if it's a beautiful dry fall day and you're wearing a Prada suit and some shiny John Lobb shoes, you have to ruin your carefully composed ensemble, lose all your adult dignity and slide around in your socks like a kid. It's even worse for women, who use shoes not only as aesthetic weapons but also to add height. It's too much to ask them to undress because you're worried about a scuff on your hardwood.
And truly, is that really what people worry about? I have never asked people to remove their shoes in my house and I would have to inspect my rugs or my floors very closely to find any evidence of damage. Red wine and baby puke are far more noxious and ubiquitous than harmful soles, chez moi anyway. And if it's dust and grit you're worried about, that's easily swept or vacuumed, and such cleaning is just the price you pay for entertaining; it's like buying food and washing up. (In my experience, the owners of shoes-off houses positively enjoy vacuuming anyway.)
No, I think the shoes-off fetish is just that: It's not a practical prohibition, but a symbolic one. It's a sort of paranoia about cleanliness; it doesn't reflect any real problem. (And yes, I'm of course only talking about dry weather. If the streets are rainy or snowy or the driveway is muddy, I always take my shoes off. But I'm usually wearing outdoor boots in those situations anyway - and if so, I bring some indoor shoes in a bag, just to avoid the indignation of socks.)
And here's my final suggestion, the one that's going to get me in the most trouble: This, too, is a class issue. Shoes-off is high-prole and lower-to-middle middle. (Sorry, Mom.) Old money lets you walk right in without any embarrassing changing. Not necessarily because they have staff to clean, but because they hate awkwardness.
Not that I condone class consciousness, of course. I'm just giving out information here. So there it is: I've said it. Now let me have it at rsmith@globeandmail.com.
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