Mike James should be having the summer of his life.
The Toronto Raptors point guard had career highs in every significant statistical category last season, including averages of 20.3 points and 5.8 assists a game. Numbers more in line with the likes of Chauncey Billups and Mike Bibby than Rafer Alston, the guard the Raptors traded to the Houston Rockets in return for James on the eve of training camp.
A lucrative long-term deal with the team of his choice is the expected reward for the one-time journeyman.
But James has had to endure his share of slings and arrows, with critics questioning his shoot-first style and tendency to speak his mind regularly and often. And then last week, James heard Chris Bosh, his pick-and-roll partner, say in a radio interview that the Raptors would be best served by adding a more traditional playmaker at point guard, while websites hinted the Raptors were just as concerned about attitude off the court than anything between the lines.
Supporters see James as a family man who wears his heart outside his jersey and used that passion to lift him from a career that started in the backwaters of professional basketball to a long National Basketball Association career.
Others wonder if the game is worth the apparent baggage.
What is James thinking?
Here is James's unvarnished (and unedited) take on the state of affairs -- touching on his reputation, his off-season boxing workouts and his views about returning to Toronto -- by way of an e-mail message from his handheld device in response to questions posed by The Globe and Mail as part of an interview request:
"Its hard when u r misunderstood and everybody thinks u r unstable.
"I have 2 kids, my wife is pregnant now and I love my family, but I'm unstable.
"I've been married in a time when the marriage failure rate is well above half and I have been happily married for almost 8 yrs but I'm unstable.
"My daughter is 3 and knows how 2 have a conversation with u and is speaking proper english, but I'm unstable.
"I'm not going 2 sell myself anymore. I'm too busy preparing for next year, I'm in the boxin ring and I'm startin 2 c results already.
"My left was terrible in the beginning but now its getting stronger. I'm startin 2 give my left hand more responsibilities, brushing my teeth, wipin myself, all in the effort 2 b a better ball player.
"Boxin is a hobby, bball pays my bills and is my 1st love. I don't want 2 fight I want 2 use the trainin 2 help me b a better ball player.
"B4 this season I wrote as a goal what I wanted 2 do this season. I wanted 2 avg 18 and 6ast and make the playoffs. 1 goal I accomplished the other I did not, so there is work to be done.
"I guess why I am so uptight is bcause people r like relax mike u made it u r in the fraternity u don't have 2 bang on the door no more, u r in.
"I'm sayin I'm not happy until I am the best pointguard I know God has created me 2 b.
"All I do is play 2 win I just want 2 win and play basketball, doing something that has kept me all my life. If it wasn't 4 this game, I had nothing else just a ball. It kept me from streets that were tuggin on me when I was a youth.
"I didn't ask 4 the lifestyle I was pushed into as a kid the lifestyle chose me.
"So all I'm sayin is the way I can say thank u 2 the game that saved my life from bein a menace 2 society is play like every game is my last and fight on that court, But I'm unstable on and off the court. I'm my families superstar if I never get what I'm tryin 2 get from this game, when my family sees me, wife and kids they c a superstar in a non basketball sense. I don't need 2 convince no 1 else and I'm not gonna try.
"I'm my families superstar.
"Toronto I believe we have a chance 2 do somethin great, but its hard every time I c some1s quote sayin somethin negative about me. At times I am made to feel like anything is better than me, and that hurts. We were a laughin stock in the beginning of the year they said wer the 2nd best team in the euroleague.
"We at least gained our respectibility back in the league xceeded all the xpectations of every1 in terms of our effort level and heart, now that has to translate into wins.
"But I'm unstable all I'm doing is workin hard everyday and preparation is key, I xpect the best and prepare 4 the worst, but most importantly this unstable guy prepared."